Thursday, June 7, 2007

Joachim Noah and the Geico Cavemen: Separated at birth?



Joakim Noah has got to be one of the ugliest motherfuckers ever. Not just athletes, I'm talking about one of the ugliest humans on earth. So ugly that when his parents took him to the zoo, the zookeeper said "Thanks for bringing him back." I have photographic proof that Noah is in actuality a caveman. Maybe a Cro-Magnon, but probably a Neaderthal. Here is a mashup of Noah courtesy of dzyanks's blog:


-Note the teeth: He can eat a apple thru a chainlink fence
-Note the hair: Never cleaned, never cut so as to blend in with his native habitat
-Note the ugliness: Keep mirrors away from his face.

Now here are some Geico Cavemen:

And just for the hell of it, UnFrozen Caveman Lawyer from SNL:


The similarities are eerie. And don't tell me he's the kid of Yannick Noah and his mom is Ms Swiss 1978. That's nonsense. I have just proven that Noah is a fucking caveman. I think Noah should submit himself to scientific study at Standford's Department of Anthropology, or at least hire himself out for parties. Well on second thought, I think a clown has a smaller chance of getting shit thrown at him by scared kids than the missing Geico Caveman, Joakim Noah.

17 comments:

Sancasm said...

So what are you saying Nigum-Nugum? He's all man? Try not to hate the specials or gifted people. Even if your man has elephantitis of the nuts I'm sure that NCAA championship mean something about his character. Lastly, his future NBA $$$ can do wonders for him. I think Noah has a chance with Paris...don't you?

Anonymous said...

Ugly doesn't describe Noah. Yogi Berra is ugly. Noah is BIZARRE. He works at it.

Anonymous said...

I laughed so hard I almost pissed my pants! In fact, I think I did squirt out a little...
Funny stuff brother. Keep it coming!
peace
tag in NC

The Nghiemesis said...

Wow, Noah himself just tried to clown me by denigrating my intellect AND my junk. Kilo...err Joachim, I know your having a good season. but your ass is still a caveman. File your teeth down, get a bone comb for your hair and finally, go find your other Caveman brethren at Geico so you guys can fling feces at each other all day.

The Nghiemesis said...

Wow, Noah himself just tried to clown me by denigrating my intellect AND my junk. Kilo...err Joachim, I know your having a good season. but your ass is still a caveman. File your teeth down, get a bone comb for your hair and finally, go find your other Caveman brethren at Geico so you guys can fling feces at each other all day.

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