Here's to you Wingman, the unsung hero of nights on the town

Legendary Wingman to Bart Simpson, Millhouse Van Houten

Wingman. What does that word mean to you? Is it a buddy who goes out with you when you want to get plastered and he carries your sorry-vomit-covered ass home? Is it the homegirl who accompanies you on 8 hour marathon shopping sessions in The City after you got dumped by your boyfriend? Is it a partner that navigated for you when your taking a roadie to Cache Creek and ended up in Deliverance country? When I was in the Army, we always had to have another partner with us as often as possible, to watch each others back. This was just an extension of our training which emphasized teamwork, camaraderie and all that good shit. But we even extended that out to when we weren't on-duty too, when we were out at night and motherfuckers wanted to mess with a soldier, you always had your 'battle buddy/wingman' with you to bail you out (sometimes literally!)
The Wingman concept has grown into a duty, as bound by rules, customs and just plain shit-you-have-to-do. I submit the following wingman article from the website Modern Drunkard Magazine. It codifies the Wingman Compact. If you are to take on the awesome responsibilities of the Wingman, you must know your duties, responsibilities and fucking danger that comes with it. Here's a snippet:

The wingman is arguably the noblest creature to ever step into a barroom.

Who else, with cavalier disregard for his personal reputation, is so willing to throw himself upon the cruel mercies of a brazen man-hater, just so his buddy can hook up with a sorority girl with big gazongas? Who else, with just a hint of a grimace, will selflessly dirty dance with a creature so hideous that no amount of hard liquor will wash the stain from his memory? Who else, especially if he’s loaded to the gills, will stand in the deepest depths of hell just so a pal can climb up his back into hook-up heaven?

Whose sterling motto is, “You are going to so owe me, dude.”?

None else but the wingman, the King Leonidas of the saloon.

There is some funny shit there people. Read it and learn.

Which one is the Cock Blocker? A Wingman must evaluate and assess the target in mere seconds. Do you have what it takes?