WTF Foolio?

Justin tv

2009-10-15T19:07:00.000-07:00

Watch live video from Live Soccer Tv on Justin.tv

OH DANG ! Great Video !!

2009-04-23T11:14:00.000-07:00

The honey got it bustn out - pure talent! She's got 'freak' thats screaming to beakout. All she needs is a hit of 'E', shot of tequila and to be reminded of how her Daddy touched in the bad place and then ..she'd be tearing up that stripper pole. Gotta admit, I was throwing ten dollar bills at my laptop screen - she was that good.

Also, got the vibe she was talking to me but then again didn't take my medication this morning.

Hey for all the Fellas: Video of the Day

2009-04-22T22:22:00.000-07:00

Some stacked, random chick on Youtube dancing her ass off. Enjoy.

JOJ Asians blow away American born

2009-04-15T04:39:00.000-07:00

- Cho at VTech smoked 33, Wong, 13, the dude in Santa Clara scored 5, the Oakland 20yo gambler killed 2, Utah guy killed three. The fired QA tech in Santa Clara that blew away his co-workers - that's 5 more, and the Old dude in Temecula, killed three. These are some of the recent mass murders committed by JOJ (Just off the Jet) Asians. All JOJ !! Not an American Asian in the group. Phd folks are calling it 'Immigrant Mass Murder Syndrome'.

Here's the profile of the big scorers: New arrival immigrant, Male, ages 20 - 45, fascinated or fixated with firearms. Generally a legal owner of multiple firearms. Loner, marginal self-esteem issues, periodic displays of delusion and paranoia. Understands and makes use of technology and the internet. Recent events resulted in personal or financial setbacks. Possible minor skirmishes with the law. Socially liked but not well known. Divorced or never married. Small penis.

Perhaps, Tupac made sense.. always roll with your Glock cocked - when in an Asian Community.

Video of The Day: That's What She Said...biotch Edition

2009-04-14T19:39:00.001-07:00

Funniest parts of the NBC show The Office is the running "That's what she said..." jokes. Here's a compilation. Enjoy biotches

Huffpo columnist Jason Notte has a hard hitting article on the origins of this glorious joke.

NUTHIN BUT A G THANG

2009-03-13T05:46:00.000-07:00

Just dropped in to see how you ladies were doing? And as I suspected, you suck asses haven't done a thing with the blog - the postings are pathetic. I should take the blog away from you lame mofos and give it to some poor illiterate ghetto kids. Yup, I can do that you useless suck asses. I'm giving you a week to post some decent shit. So, pull your pretty panties up, wipe the sperm off your faces and gets with the typing - playtime is over.

Now, I gots to get back to my economic stimulus package, smak'n the bitches and pimp'n the hoes

I thought Kriss Kross was bad: Here's the next big thing

2009-01-02T11:57:00.000-08:00

From SteakNBJ

I think it's time for the newest fad to catch on with the 'it' crowd and I believe I have found it!

Video of the Day: Crazy jazz Edition

2008-12-17T01:39:00.000-08:00

I was searching YouTube for Depeche Mode's Strangelove and this video came up in the results. I thought it was another cover version by some band. I was wrong.

This band is called Koop and they too had a song named Strangelove.. They are Swedish and they produce all their sound electronically, all the vocalists they use on their albums are guests. This one here is Norwegian singer Hilde Louise Asbjørnsen. Oh by the way, They are melding Swedish jazz beats, female jazz vocalists from all over the world and Caribbean beats from the islands of the Caribbean. And they are making it work. Fucking outstanding.

I like Jazz, I like electronic dance music, I love female vocalists who can sing. Koop is killing me with all three! I'm now a big Koop and Hilde Louise fan.

Daily Dose of K-Pop

2008-12-14T23:36:00.000-08:00

This came out in 1994. My Korean roommate rented these videotapes at some video store. I heard it and was hooked. K-Pop=goodness

Let me throw some facts in your face:

-Bands name is Marrioner. The song is "Cocktail Sarang(love)"
-Yes this proves that asian chicks wearing beanies are HOT.
-There was a time in Korean pop culture that everyone wanted to be jamacian. Hence you have the reggae-ey beat and the bermuda pants the fat guy is wearing sporting the colors of Africa
-Any Korean over the age of 23 will know it. So all you white boys with yellow-fever, use this nugget and you might-just might, get some trim.

A real catchy tune. Enjoy.

The Greatest Lie the Devil Ever Told...

2008-12-11T22:50:00.000-08:00

##### Encrypted: decrypt with http://www.fourmilab.ch/javascrypt/
ZZZZZ SLQAB EPRBE FVAQO SUIPE OWJXQ DUUSB ODOBM FIHWR FDJKT VCODC
WWMVH CGNTI LSRVM ALCKI XMLIQ NIQDM IDNMT BVLLL FXBIP QOTMU AAATS
JALBI OWBWJ APXDT TETII JQRHM WGIKQ EXACI VIMUG BFMSW MNIGP NMSTI
IGXKO OQEGK BNPNI MBVUO HMGHO PEUVQ WGRMB OLOCD AFBBF SGNXC SPCBR
POVMN ICVER TNLRV WFWGD ILOFU QAVON JURFK RIQKK EVPIE MVQFT LEULW
GRNEK WQURH NCLEE MCTNG MVNFQ TWHGF IOWWR VLJDL TDIDL SLMWC TILHU
WKUDT ETVMW BJSIC RGPSS FNCPS EFAKI EPPTB OAQNV IOQML SXNIT LFRCX
DWTWM CSVAD CLBMA FSCEX JXGOA NFUPI PERGV LWBWF LUDJN XPMDV WSAOM
KDFBF GDQIO OPQMF SKIGE NCIBX QVMIE QOTRS JMIFE GTQUW NCOQI MWMWP
WUWPP FNPDH QJXEU MQKMO PNNRL FDGEM TOVOO ONUDL FRGDD NXKPF JOWLZ
YYYYY
##### End encrypted message

The Kitchen Sink or the Fuck-it-I'm-writing-about everything-post

2008-11-17T13:20:00.000-08:00

This is a post about nothing. That's right nothing. I have not written anything decent in a long time. Well time is up beeyotches. Put your shoes on and follow me.

1-Barack Obama was elected our president on Nov 4th. I never believed that racist-ass America would elect a black man(you can argue all day if Pres Obama is really black, like Charlie Murphy black, but fuck all that, he's black.) president. As you can tell from my prior posts, I disliked the Republicans so much, especially after McCain announced Palin as his running mate, I had to vote for Obama. I started doing some research on my own, just so I could get a read on this dude. Everything I found out was cool, refreshing and actually nice. I concluded that this was one of the smartest men in American politics.

That was before I even heard him speak.

I cannot remember the last time I even listened to more than a few seconds of what a politician had to say. It was all background noise. But listening to President Obama for the first time was a shock to the system. My thought process was in overdrive, ping-ponging everywhere:

This dudes got a nice sounding voice.
He is not talking politician jibber jabber either.
This motherfucker is smart.
This motherfucker is making sense.
Holy shit is he talking to me?
Man, is this what it feels like to have heard John Kennedy talk? Even...MLK?

That fool made me care about what is going on outside of my front door. Seriously, my generation sucks. We are told that we don't believe in shit, that we were Generation X blah blah ...that we were the children of the information age, that we grew up in divorce, drugs, economic uncertainty, etc... Basically we were a bunch of assholes. Obama told us to forget that shit, we're Americans, we can change shit if we want to.

We have been warned against offering the people of this nation false hope. But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope.

Yes We Can biotches.

2)My boy SnapOffMode used to post with me here. Apparently, he's after some trim and wanted nothing 'incriminating' hanging out on the Internet on him. Well buddy, this is for you:

I only care about your safety and well-being. God bless.

3-I'm going to sleep. To be continued.

end communication

Video of the Day: Who watches the Watchmen Edition

2008-11-15T10:23:00.000-08:00

There are alot ofhaters that can't wait for this move to fail. I'm not one of them. Latest trailer for Watchmen.

BTW It's probably not a good idea to mess with the bald, blue guy who is glowing.

Video of the Day: Jessica Alba Stares you down Edition

2008-11-13T14:28:00.001-08:00

www.ibeatyou.com was holding a staring contest and Jessica Alba has entered. Baron Davis also did some shit too.

Here is Alba's video. If you didn't think she was hot before, you will after this.

Yes We Can

2008-11-04T08:22:00.000-08:00

Video of the Day: Dumb Ass Sideline Reporter Edition

2008-10-27T20:33:00.000-07:00

My beloved 49ers are sucking ass this season. Before being crushed by Seattle this Sunday, Brand New coach, Mike Singletary (who almost broke shithead TE Vernon Davis in half for fucking around during the game) was interviewed by Fox sideline reporter Danyelle Sargent.

She immediately steps in a STINKING PILE o' SHIT when she says to Singletary 'I heard you called your mentor Bill Walsh...'

Apparently she did not get the memo ...Bill Walsh died last year. The football field they are standing on has a plaque with his name on it...the 49ers named the field after him when he died.

Here is the news story at the Merc.

Oh yeah, there is fucking video of this worst sideline interview eva.

Sarah Palin can eat shit.

2008-10-16T16:37:00.000-07:00

All I need to know about that wack-job Palin is this...

Fuck you and your horse Palin. And take that old bastard McCain with you, that dishonorable fuck.

Pic of the Day: Praise Allah Edition

2008-10-02T15:04:00.001-07:00

Fuck the Raiders

2008-09-11T22:43:00.000-07:00

The Oakland Raiders got their ass-whupped on Sunday to their hated rival the Denver Broncos, 41-14.

Their Defensive Coordinator, Bob Ryan, had a rant after the game that is hysterically funny.

Here's one of the comments after that article:

RAIDER$EVER Says:
September 11th, 2008 at 4:13 pm

IF KIFFIN IS FIRED AND RYAN STAYS IT MEANS AL DAVIS´S BUNGHOLE IS EXTRA JUICY BECAUSE OF ITS MANY LICKS…WHAT THE FCUK WAS THAT????

Ahhhhh Raider fans, you gotta love 'em.

end communication

Video of the Day: Cindy Lauper Rocking the Shit Edition

2008-09-11T00:44:00.000-07:00

Cindy Lauper was one crazy biotch back in the day. When she released She's So Unusual in 1983, she blew up. Then she was with Capt Lou Albano in WrestleMania...she's a 80s icon man and I love her...but I have nothing but contempt for that other 80s 'Queen of Pop', the fuckhead Jezebel biotch of the First Order, Madonna.

Anyway, since 1985 Lauper has released a ton of albums, been acting and gaining a huge following amongst gay men. Those dudes are fiercely loyal to their icons, so she's up there with Betty, Cher, Kylie and Madonna now.

Lauper just cut a new record and one of the songs is the shit. Watch and enjoy.

BTW Cindy Lauper is fucking 55 years old now. Holy Shit.

Pic of the Day - .45 bullet to the Face Edition

2008-09-09T20:55:00.000-07:00

I love me some inspirational Posters. From one of the greatest movies ever, even though QT turned fag and dumped Mira Sorvino

Pic of the Day - Female FAIL style

2008-09-08T21:58:00.000-07:00

Check this honey out. I could not imagine NOT putting my frikken drawers on the right way. Somewhere a kitten died because of this chick's Epic Fail.

Getting back on the wagon.

2008-09-04T16:51:00.000-07:00

Alright all you swinging johnsons, The Nghiemesis has decided that this blog has been languishing enough. There is going to be some pipe-hitting knowledge soon to be dropped. As Shooter McGavin said in Happy Gilmore "I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast!"

This is for the Street Fighter fiends everywhere, especially SnapOffMode

2007-12-08T21:46:00.000-08:00

Capcom is releasing Street Fighter IV for the next-gen consoles. SnapOffMode-don't cream your pants too soon.

SnapOffMode is going to the San Diego Comic Convention

2007-07-18T12:55:00.000-07:00

Here's a pic of some of SnapOffMode's friends that he's hooking up with. I think he met the one of the right playing AoE with SanCasm.

Fucking SnapOffMode is playing with FIRE

2007-07-11T15:10:00.000-07:00

Cpt Kirk can't die because Heaven isn't big enough for his BRASS BALLS

You know how you joke with your friends, but there are some areas are just off-limits? Well for me its the usual shit, it goes like this:

Don't talk shit about my wife, kids, family of course. Then it kind of veers off into a fucking area that will get you fucked up.

One of these areas is Captain James Tiberius Kirk of the Starship Enterprise. I truly believe that he was the manliest man in the entire fucking galaxy. He would have kicked Chuck Norris's ass, then fucked Chuck Norris in the ass-not because he was gay, but because he was such a fucking bad ass and he was totally comfortable in his manliness.

So, I'm away from the blog for a bit and then I see this shit? WTF Foolio? It's all easy to clown on The Kirk. I mean, he's got his haters and shit. I thought SnapOffMode was a little more enlightened. I thought wrong. So for the next couple of weeks, keep a eye on this page. Motherfucker's are going to be broken off.

I am not a JappoPhile or a HanGookoPhile, but I know fucking good tunes

2007-07-11T15:05:00.001-07:00

One day my boy Jae was watching his usual Korean tapes and shit at the Crib. Then this song comes on and I listen to it for a second and I'm hooked like Lindsey Lohan to a 12in line of blow in the woman's restroom in the club. K-Pop is the shit. This song is the shit. Enjoy beeytoches.

Pic of the Day: I found a pic of SnapOffMode's 'partner'

2007-06-19T14:03:00.000-07:00

Holy shit. He asked me to find him a nice Japanese girl. I guess he got impatient and went to Thulsa Doom's Mountain of Power and found himself a new 'friend'

Joachim Noah and the Geico Cavemen: Separated at birth?

2007-06-07T11:21:00.000-07:00

Joakim Noah has got to be one of the ugliest motherfuckers ever. Not just athletes, I'm talking about one of the ugliest humans on earth. So ugly that when his parents took him to the zoo, the zookeeper said "Thanks for bringing him back." I have photographic proof that Noah is in actuality a caveman. Maybe a Cro-Magnon, but probably a Neaderthal. Here is a mashup of Noah courtesy of dzyanks's blog:

-Note the teeth: He can eat a apple thru a chainlink fence
-Note the hair: Never cleaned, never cut so as to blend in with his native habitat
-Note the ugliness: Keep mirrors away from his face.

Now here are some Geico Cavemen:

And just for the hell of it, UnFrozen Caveman Lawyer from SNL:

The similarities are eerie. And don't tell me he's the kid of Yannick Noah and his mom is Ms Swiss 1978. That's nonsense. I have just proven that Noah is a fucking caveman. I think Noah should submit himself to scientific study at Standford's Department of Anthropology, or at least hire himself out for parties. Well on second thought, I think a clown has a smaller chance of getting shit thrown at him by scared kids than the missing Geico Caveman, Joakim Noah.

The Onion is one of the funniest sites on the web

2007-06-05T14:31:00.000-07:00

Got this from The Onion. If you have never been there before, peruse the archives and read some of the funniest satire on the intertubes. They mainly wrote articles, but lately have started releasing 2 min videos of some fucking funny shit.

Here is one that you watch and sagely nod your head saying "No wonder I don't watch any of those punk ass news channels anymore." Funny as hell.

Breaking News: Something Happening In Haiti

I'm the nicest guy I know, did I tell you that?

2007-05-29T23:55:00.000-07:00

Honestly, I don't go out of my way to buddy-fuck(Army speak for cock-block, stab in the back, shoot in the back, abandon to the clutches of a nasty beeyotch at the bar, you know what I mean) my friends. I don't mace people for staring at me the wrong way. And I 'repair' my buddie's XBOX 360 consoles for them, just for the hell of it.

So tonight I am just going to pat myself on the back because I FUCKING CAME THRU LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER.

Here's the scene at the casa around midnight:

Here's what your looking at:
1x hijacked Dell POS 3000 tower that I 'borrowed', gutted and reformatted
1x out of 3 Heinekins I drank that night trying to soothe my anger from throwing that fucking Dell POS 3000 out the fucking window onto Geary Blvd.
3x XBox 360 consoles that I lovingly 'repaired' for my Anh-Kap-ass cuzzo, Tigerkn33 and my new Pinoy-Pride cuzzo, Disco Stew.
1x PCI-SATA card that only fucking works in a Dell POS 3000 instead of my fucking handmade, godlike Computer that is so powerful fucking angels sing when I turn it on. [Does the Nghiemesis have to choke a mostherfucker at Newegg.com for selling him some bullshit SATA card? Do I got to take this shit to Resellerratings.com? Gotta think on that.]

This process is so fucking convoluted, I was going to go Lindsey Lohan and fuck somebody up on the street. But I chilled, cracked open another Heineken and figured shit out.

Well, like always, The Nghiemesis comes thru again. So I had to post this shit. These two fools will be getting their shit soon. When they turn on their 360s, when the fans inside start roaring again, they will whisper the name: The Nghiemesis motherfucker, the Nghiemesis.

NBA Draft Lottery: Embrace to Suck you beeyotches in Boston and Memphis

2007-05-22T19:57:00.000-07:00

Its Official: The sky is falling, it has started to rain frogs and shit, the river water is turning to motherfucking blood in Memphis and Boston. Has the Apocalypse begun? Naww, today the NBA Draft Lottery took place and those two cities took a kick to the collective sports nuts. The reason there is a draft lottery in the first place is that teams do not tank games to purpose to try to position themselves higher draft position. Someone forgot to tell Memphis and Boston that. In the closing days of this past season, these two sad sack franchises put on a display of 'winning by losing' that would have shamed Pete Rose. It was pathetic watch these two teams 'compete' for the worst record in the league for a shot at Greg Oden or Kevin Durant. Boston GM Danny Ainge about creamed his pants and shit trying to shmooze Durant's mom at the Final Four. Shit was so blatant that the NBA had to publically call his ass out. Coach Doc Rivers benched starters with 'injuries' for the last 10 fucking games. Memphis canned their coach and hired some shmuck named Tony Barone? You tell me if your can even point to Memphis on the map much less name the head coach of the Grizzlies.

The city of Memphis is just fucking pathetic. Look at these headlines leading up to today:

Why the Grizzlies NEED to win the lottery

In the NBA, one player can make a difference

When pursuing top pick, it helps to have a little heart

Here's why the Grizzlies want the No. 1 pick so badly

Jesus, why don't the hicks in Memphis just get off their knees and and their lips off of David Stern's dick. These headlines just scream "We suck, we are just a town of broke-dick ass-slack-jawed-yokels, please oh please give us a good pick in the lottery?" You know I'm not surprised-90% of the population of Memphis are used to playing the real lottery every payday anyway. Fucking losers. Memphis sounds like a town that if your from there and someone asks about your childhood, you lie and tell them your from Dallas or some shit. What a shitty sports town. the name of their piss-ant newspaper is the Memphis Commercial Appeal. WTF Foolio? Is that a goddamn business trade magazine or the only major newspaper in Memphis?

But Boston is a different in a altogether more unpleasantly pathetic way. Here are some choice quotes from the Boston Globe website within 30 minutes of the fucking lottery ending:

Bob Ryan, columnist-
Who did what to whom? Was it decided that 16 championships in 30 years was somehow unfair and obscene and that enough was enough and the Celtics are never going to get another break again and that's that?
Because that's what it looks like. Nothing else can explain how the Celtics continue to suffer the wrath of powerful unseen forces determined to make their lives miserable.
Peter May, columnist-
After salivating for months over the prospect of either Oden or Durant wearing Celtic green for seasons to come, Danny Ainge and Co. were dealt a hammer blow by the Ping-Pong balls. The Celtics will end picking up fifth -- the worst-case scenario -- in next month's draft.

Jesse Nunes-
The Ultimate Nightmare has come through for Celtics fans. Not only do we miss out on the two guys who are head-and-shoulders above everyone else in this draft, but we miss out on the next two best players after that. Al Horford and Yi Jianlian may not even be possibilities now.

Number 5? Are you kidding me? Even the most pessimistic Celtics fan couldn't have envisioned such a catastrophic result.
and some comments from Celtic fans:
Here's to another decade of missing the playoffs.
I swear to god I knew we had the 5th pick. It is sick I turned it off.
GOD I FEEL SO NAUSEOUS!!!!!!!!!
For god's sake FIRE DANNY! The one thing he's been able to do was tank the season, and that got us a fifth pick. FIRE DANNY NOW!!!
just sickening....they can not catch a break. This makes me sick to my stomach....see you in another 10 years.
My house is like a morgue right now. This is one of the darkest days in Boston sports history.
Its because that moron tommy heinson was there, i was hoping he would have a heart attack when they showed we had the 5th pick

Jesus, you'd think the president died frmo all the moaning, bitching, lamenting of the Celtic faithful.

I love the NBA. After 16 years of suckitude from the Golden State Warriors, Boston Celtic fans can now bend over and get the broomstick for a change--assholes.

End Communication

HR motherfuckers can suck a phat dick straight up PART-II.

2007-05-22T19:49:00.000-07:00

AIght continuing my meeting from hell with HR idiot/beeyotch...

Our HR lady is actually some girl-I think she was probably chinese or something, tells us that they made some changes to our HR plans and that we would truly benefit from them. And then she looks up at us like she just dropped the 11th Commandment or something. There's this fucking pregnant silence for like 20 seconds as everyone waits for her to expand on this fucking statement like any normal person. But she doesn't and starts wrapping up the fucking meeting!

I don't say shit in meetings. If I got a question, I'll ask but I'm not one to open my mouth. So HR Beeyotch wraps up the meeting in less than 20 minutes. Fuck-it took her longer to drive here from fucking Oakland airport. I'm fucking stupified. You came all the way up here for this shit? Just because your sorry ass was late as hell and fucked up like a soup sandwich?

I'm not even talking about this sorry ass anymore. Fuck all HR people-they deserve all the shit they get.

End Communication.

HR motherfuckers can suck a phat dick straight up PART I.

2007-05-17T16:42:00.000-07:00

You know what I'm talking about. HR motherfuckers, wherever you work, are motherfucking beeyotches.

They walk around like their shit don't stink, like your fucking supposed to lick their boots if you ever need something like changing your address.

I'll tell you a story of a HR beeyotch that just happened to me. We are supposed to have a meeting last week with the HR reps from the home office right. Well, the meeting didn't go as planned.
First off, HR beeyotch came a half hour late, flying up from Southern California. WTF foolio?

Everyone's waiting around for the meeting to start so the beeyotch can't get set-up properly. She's got some slides she wants to show, but didn't bring a fucking projector or even ask if we had one. Do we have one at our office? Hell yeah, but idiot HR skank is too embarrassed to ask So what does she do? Fucking set-up her laptop on one end of the conference room table and points at it as she talks. Dumb-Ass, your Powerpoint demo looks like shit when motherfuckers got to squint to see what the fuck your talking about.

Damn, I got to continue this shit in Part II-When HR Skank REALLY fucks up

Sorry everyone, I've been slipping

2007-05-03T16:07:00.000-07:00

I know that I have not posted at the rate that I want and my millions of Hulkamaniacs need, but real life has a way of butting it's ugly face in my shit.

You see, I'm on my way to Thailand for a....ahhh...little vacation. On this vacation I'm going to meet with some doctors...err friends that will help me with a problem that I have had since I was a kid. You see when your born with both male and female genitalia you...um...sorry, I've said too much.

Let's just say that when I get back, things are going to be a little different...WTF Foolio will be getting a little injection of Vitamin E...E as in Estrogen.

The butterfly will be coming out of the cocoon...

hahahaahahah

Fooled ya. This foolio is relocating to a new crib and thats taken up alot of my spare time after work. Trust me, even in a tiny apt, you accumulate hella shit in three years. I'll be back and if your mug soon enough. End communication

Here's the difference between White People and Asians

2007-04-20T22:15:00.000-07:00

Sorry everyone about the absence all week. There's some straight shit coming your way from the Nghiemesis these coming days.

Now, on to the show...

Everyone saw what that twisted freak did in Virginia on Monday. And like all asians, my fucking jaw dropped on Tuesday when it turned out the motherfucker was asian. Fuck! Now we got one of them-a fucking mass murderer on our hands just like the white folks. But there's a huge difference-Cho's family know when to fess up and take responsibilty for their deranged kin. Today the family of that-fucker-that-is-burning-in-Hell issued a heartfelt apology to everyone.

On behalf of our family, we are so deeply sorry for the devastation my brother has caused. No words can express our sadness that 32 innocent people lost their lives this week in such a terrible, senseless tragedy. We are heartbroken.
We grieve alongside the families, the Virginia Tech community, our State of Virginia, and the rest of the nation. And, the world.

Now contrast this with the parents of those fuckwads Klebold and Harris after the Columbine Massacre. Harris' parents have not said shit since it happened and Klebold's parents said this shit:

"Dylan (Klebold) did not do this because of the way he was raised," Susan Klebold told columnist David Brooks in Saturday's editions of The New York Times. "He did it in contradiction to the way he was raised."
"I haven't done anything for which I need forgiveness, Susan Klebold said."

WTF? Are these white people fucking clueless? No more than 5 days after their son goes on the worst rampage ever, his family is profusely apologizing for his actions. 8 years after Columbine and the parents still have not apologized for the actions of their twisted progeny. Fucking people.

I'd like to sign off with one more quote from the Cho family statement

Every day since April 16, my father, mother and I pray for students Ross Abdallah Alameddine, Brian Roy Bluhm, Ryan Christopher Clark, Austin Michelle Cloyd, Matthew Gregory Gwaltney, Caitlin Millar Hammaren, Jeremy Michael Herbstritt, Rachael Elizabeth Hill, Emily Jane Hilscher, Jarrett Lee Lane, Matthew Joseph La Porte, Henry J. Lee, Partahi Mamora Halomoan Lumbantoruan, Lauren Ashley McCain, Daniel Patrick O'Neil, J. Ortiz-Ortiz, Minal Hiralal Panchal, Daniel Alejandro Perez, Erin Nicole Peterson, Michael Steven Pohle, Jr., Julia Kathleen Pryde, Mary Karen Read, Reema Joseph Samaha, Waleed Mohamed Shaalan, Leslie Geraldine Sherman, Maxine Shelly Turner, Nicole White, Instructor Christopher James Bishop, and Professors Jocelyne Couture-Nowak, Kevin P. Granata, Liviu Librescu and G.V. Loganathan.

R.I.P. to the fallen

Geek Squad flunkie/pervert caught taking cellphone video of a hottie in the shower

2007-04-12T09:57:00.000-07:00

Well, well looks like Geek Squad and Best Buy have a little lawsuit on their hands.

According to the story, this dude, Hao Kuo Chi, went over to a woman's house to fix her computer. He sees her hottie daughter taking a shower and like an idiot, plants his cellphone in the bathroom, hoping to get some material to exercise to later. The younger sister finds the phone, takes out the memory card and they find the 'footage'. Dude even tried to bribe them to get it back! Jesus what a idiot. And the daughter that was in the shower? A smoking hottie! Geek Squad perv could have done alot worse.

Here is an interview with the hottie

Road/Cell Phone Rage in South Korea: Korean dude pulls a Terminator

2007-04-12T09:29:00.000-07:00

I don't know about you, but if my cell phone isn't working, I'm not driving my S500 Mercedes through the front door of T-Mobile in a fit of rage. This dude must have been kinda pissed off.

Apparently since 'Kims' phone didn't work too well, even though he was told they would replace it with a newer model, after getting the brush off from SK Telecom 16 times over the phone, dude camped the car outside SK Telecom's corporate HQ with some signs lamenting his problem. Oh man, this guys already a nut. Dude was told to leave.

He pulled a fucking Terminator ("I'll Be Back") and rams the fucking Mercedes thru the front lobby. He did not get out and commence to shoot up the location looking for Sarah Connor fortunately.

Here's the kicker: The car wasn't his, it was his friend's.

Man of the Week: Nappy Headed Hos Edition

2007-04-11T16:13:00.000-07:00

Snoop, how can a motherfucker thank you?

So, earlier this week I awarded Dan Imus Asshole of the Week for his comments about the nappy headed hos on the womans Rutgers bball team. This story has blown up to epic proportions and Imus is visibly, physically shrinking before our very eyes. That jerk looks like he's 100 years old now! Snoop Dogg has weighed in and his shit is PRICELESS.

Snoop has dismissed comparisons between sexist hip-hop lyrics and the recent racist remarks made by radio DJ Don Imus.

Imus was suspended by CBS Radio and MSNBC on Monday after he referred to the Rutgers University women's basketball team as "nappy-headed hoes."

Snoop frequently refers to women as "bitches" and "hoes" in his music, but insists Imus' use of the term was unacceptable and says the 66-year-old DJ should be taken off the air.

The star says, "It's a completely different scenario.

"(Rappers) are not talking about no collegiate basketball girls who have made it to the next level in education and sports.

"We're talking about hoes that's in the 'hood that ain't doing [bleep], that's trying to get a [bleep] for his money. These are two separate things.

"First of all, we ain't no old-ass white men that sit up on MSNBC going hard on black girls.

"We are rappers that have these songs coming from our minds and our souls that are relevant to what we feel. I will not let them [bleeps] say we are in the same league as him.

"Kick him off the air forever."

Utterly priceless. Many have written in recent days about the apparent dichotomy of the black community condemning Imus' gaffe, but not the rap artists over the years that sing about beeyotches and hos. Snoop has distilled the arguments down to their base levels, rendering the bleetings of the haters as futile and then pimped slapped them like Ike did Tina. Man, I love Snoop, but they are still haters out there. I can think of one right now**cough**Doug Booie**cough** who say that Snoop fell off, that Snoop is too busy doing other shit than spitting raps. I say that he's still got it, but why flaunt it? His shit from 15 years ago is still better than the bullshit released these days(E-40 excepted).

Here's to Snoop, a motherfucker that is still keeping it real.

60 Minutes follows Navy SEALs in Afghanistan

2007-04-11T12:07:00.000-07:00

What's amazing about this video is that the SEALs are pretty paranoid about publicity (Not as paranoid than Delta-when's the last time you ever heard anything about them?). This reporter has some amazing access with her camera, following them on ops in A-Stan. Well-balanced and informative. Check it out.

Asshole of the Week: Nappy Headed Hos Edition

2007-04-09T09:38:00.000-07:00

A Nappy Headed Ho for Rutgers takes it to the rack

So Rutgers lost to Tennessee in the Womans NCAA National Championship. Woman's basketball is painful to watch, so I can proudly sat I didn't even watch a commercial for that borefest. Between the homophobic coaches, lesbian coaches rug munching on their own players, fans who like the sport because of the preponderence of homos and idiot homophobic fans who deny there are homos in womans basketball, woman's basketball in general has issues, least of which are the horse faced chicks that play in it. But because of the woman's tournament, I did find my Asshole of the Week. After Rutgers won, Dan Imus, a radio wank from New York cracked this shit on them:

The Rutgers team, which includes eight black women, had lost the day before in the NCAA women's championship game. Imus was speaking with producer Bernard McGuirk about the game when the exchange began on "Imus in the Morning," which is broadcast to millions of people on more than 70 stations and MSNBC.
"That's some rough girls from Rutgers," Imus said. "Man, they got tattoos..."
"Some hardcore hos," McGuirk said.
"That's some nappy-headed hos there, I'm going to tell you that," Imus said.

Now Imus is in a world of shit. When you have Al Sharpton and Jessee Jackson on your ass, I would start polishing up the ole' resume-Your Going to Get Fired Son.

I got no problems with people's beliefs, stereotypes, or what they do and say privately. Whatever floats your boat right? But this F-idiot (fucking idiot) had to blab it on national radio. Of course female athletes look fearsome to some males, even threatening. I had a fucking 6'1" center for our woman's college team have a crush on me and it scared the shit out of me. Would she roll-over in bed and smother me like a beached whale if I dated her? But you don't say it on the fucking airwaves you fool. And now your ass is going to hit the bricks. Well, good luck on satellite radio you fucking trick-ass mark. And here's a picture of Imus-this motherfuckers got a white-man's Jheri Curl for chrissakes! And he's clowning the black chicks at Rutgers for nappy hair?

Jheri-curled Asshole of the Week

Wild Grizzly bears are our friends...until they ate me.

2007-04-05T09:31:00.000-07:00

I'm sure all of you out there seen or heard the story about Timothy Treadwell, AKA the Grizzly Man. He and his girlfriend were killed in a bear attack in 2003. He was a ex-drug addict who decided to watch the bears in Alaska. He ended up doing it for 13 years, writing books about his experience and was the subject of a film documentary. He was a guest on talk shows and started a website about protecting bears. This all sounds tragically ironic right?

BUT...(you knew there was a 'But' right?)

I have to say I was laughing my ASS off reading about this moron and his TIMELY demise.

Kevin Sanders, a naturalist and guide, wrote up a great recap of the probable last moments of this fools misguided life here. Its great reading and you'll be laughing your ass off in no time.

Anyway back to the story:

This fool was a fucking idiot of the HIGHEST order. He was not a trained scientist, biologist, zoologist or ecologist. After ODing on drugs in the 90s, he started going to Alaska. Having no formal scientific training, all he did was hang out with the bears. That's it. Oh he said he was 'protecting' them from poachers and hunters. So what did the poor bears do when you weren't there the other 8 months out of the year asshole? He worked as a fucking bartender who saved his money all year to go to Alaska to see these bears. He was just a hippie who decided that HE was going to protect the grizzlies, that HE was an eco-warrior, that HE understood these wild animals. He broke every single tenet, rule, protocol, fucking everything, when he was around wild animals, especially these huge, omnivorous predators. The list of idiot shit this guy did boggles the mind and makes you think "It took the bears 13 years to kill this dumb fuck?" That says more about the bear's tolerance of human beings than it does about Treadwell's 'methods'.

-He stopped carrying bear spray with him several years ago. A friend later said that "He just felt that was an invasive, aggressive mechanism that translated into a kind of attitude. He didn't want to have that attitude." Yeah buddy, I think bear spray would have helped when the bear was gnawing on your fucking head huh?
-He anthropomorphized the bears, giving them names, comparing their behavior to human equivalents. One bear he named "Ollie, the big old grumpy bear". Treadwell didn't like this bear because it had fought another female bear(sow) that Treadwell did like. Some remains of Treadwell and his idiot girlfriend were found in the stomach of a 1,000lb bear killed at their campsite. Many theorize that this bear was 'Ollie'. Oh sweet irony...'Ollie' was a 'bad' bear and 'bad' bears do bad things...such as kill and eat idiot hippies who fuck with them.
-He would creep within yards of feeding bears and also sows with cubs, talking in a childlike sing-song voice to 'soothe' them. Yep, that really worked when that bear was mauling your hippie ass huh?
-Treadwell camped at the worst time of the year-at the end of the salmon run when bears are desperate to put on weight before hibernation. There was a poor berry crop that year too. Uh not a good idea to be around wild animals when they are 'desperate' and 'hungry'. Did this guy need a fucking flashing neon sign that DANGER DANGER?
-Treadwell purposely camped RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE of intersecting bear paths that led to the river. This quote in the Anchorage Daily News says it best-

According to a memo from Alaska Department of Fish and Game biologist Larry Van Daele, Treadwell set up his bear-viewing camp "in such a way that bears wishing to traverse the area would have had to either wade in the lake or walk right next to the tent. A person could not have designed a more dangerous location to set up a camp.''
In videos found at the scene, Van Daele said, Treadwell described "his campsite as (in) a potentially dangerous location, but he expresses his confidence that he understands these bears and they will not harm him.''

Naw, the bears didn't harm him...they only left his head attached to his spine under a pile of mud. They were also considerate enough to stuff his girlfriend mostly-consumed body under a mound of dirt and twigs in the camp so she would easily be found by Park rangers. Wild bears are great.

And what about the idiot girlfriend who was with him? This fool was a Treadwell groupie who tracked him down after watching him on TV. Needless to say, instead of boning this shithouse bearologist, she ended screaming her head off as 'Ollie' did what wild bears do-eat, eat and eat some more.

This fucking moron also stated that if something were to happen to him, he did not want anything to happen to the bear that did it. WTF? This guy was warned over and over again by park authorities that bears that attack humans are almost ALWAYS killed, lest they are emboldened to attack someone else later. Two bears died because of this sorry asshole as a direct result of his dumb ass getting eaten. The head ranger at Katmai National Park even went so far as to tell him

"The last time I saw Timothy, I told him to be safe out there and that none of my staff would ever forgive him if they had to kill a bear because of him,'' she said. "I kind of had a heart-to-heart with him. I told him he was teaching the wrong message.

"This is unfortunate, (but) I'm not surprised. It really wasn't a matter of if; it was just a matter of when.''

When these two fools died, they were going to video-tape the encounter. Treadwell was wearing a mike on his shirt. This tape was found. That's the main way that Rangers were able to piece together this mercy killing. Only the authorities have heard it, but it'll probably end up on the internet soon enough. Hopefully :)

I want to end this post with a quote by our Shithouse Naturalist Who Got Eaten By the Bears And Got His Girlfriend Eaten Too.

'I would be honored to end up in bear scat.'

On the tape he was screaming like a beeyotch. Probably wish you hadn't seen a bear in your life then did you Timothy?

Pic of the Day- I was saving this pic for a special post...

2007-04-03T14:24:00.000-07:00

This is for SnapOffMode-In college he attempted to grow a weed plant in our closet. It was one fucking plant and he thought he was Pablo Escobar. I told him he'd end up in jail and this guy would be his cellmate.But I just laugh whenever I look at it. Found in the great wilderness that is the Internet...I think its SOM's BFF

Here's to you Wingman, the unsung hero of nights on the town

2007-04-03T11:09:00.000-07:00

Legendary Wingman to Bart Simpson, Millhouse Van Houten

Wingman. What does that word mean to you? Is it a buddy who goes out with you when you want to get plastered and he carries your sorry-vomit-covered ass home? Is it the homegirl who accompanies you on 8 hour marathon shopping sessions in The City after you got dumped by your boyfriend? Is it a partner that navigated for you when your taking a roadie to Cache Creek and ended up in Deliverance country? When I was in the Army, we always had to have another partner with us as often as possible, to watch each others back. This was just an extension of our training which emphasized teamwork, camaraderie and all that good shit. But we even extended that out to when we weren't on-duty too, when we were out at night and motherfuckers wanted to mess with a soldier, you always had your 'battle buddy/wingman' with you to bail you out (sometimes literally!)
The Wingman concept has grown into a duty, as bound by rules, customs and just plain shit-you-have-to-do. I submit the following wingman article from the website Modern Drunkard Magazine. It codifies the Wingman Compact. If you are to take on the awesome responsibilities of the Wingman, you must know your duties, responsibilities and fucking danger that comes with it. Here's a snippet:

The wingman is arguably the noblest creature to ever step into a barroom.
Who else, with cavalier disregard for his personal reputation, is so willing to throw himself upon the cruel mercies of a brazen man-hater, just so his buddy can hook up with a sorority girl with big gazongas? Who else, with just a hint of a grimace, will selflessly dirty dance with a creature so hideous that no amount of hard liquor will wash the stain from his memory? Who else, especially if he’s loaded to the gills, will stand in the deepest depths of hell just so a pal can climb up his back into hook-up heaven?

Whose sterling motto is, “You are going to so owe me, dude.”?

None else but the wingman, the King Leonidas of the saloon.

There is some funny shit there people. Read it and learn.

Which one is the Cock Blocker? A Wingman must evaluate and assess the target in mere seconds. Do you have what it takes?

Uhhh either these Frenchmen have Balls of Brass or they have a death wish

2007-03-30T14:54:00.000-07:00

Nage avec le grand blanc
Caricato da Flavmax

SnapOffMode found this crazy video from this French site. WTF do these guys want to go out like the Crocodile Hunter? This is some of the craziest shit I've ever seen.

FYI video is accompanied by some shitty rock music-you have been warned!

Pic of the Day: I Can't Make This Shit Up Edition

2007-03-26T17:14:00.000-07:00

Lil John went out and got himself in the Guinness Book of World Records with this FUCKING rope and 'pendant'. This motherfucker is rocking a $500,000 "Crunk Ain't Dead" pendant. I guess proper grammar wasn't included either. Here's a quote from the article"

Jon, real name Jonathan Smith, says, "I'm glad the Guinness World Records folks acknowledged me and my 'Crunk Aint Dead' piece. I spent a load of money on that chain.
"I had no idea I would break a record and be recognized for it. It's an honor. ... I grew up reading and hearing about people and celebrities who break records in the Guinness world records book and it always fascinated me. Now I'm on the list."

And the rapper has sent out a challenge to his peers to try and top his feat of bling: "Let's just see how many rappers try to outdo my pendant and break my record."

Amazing. Good for him. We all need challenges in our lives, whether its to write a novel, climb Mt. Everest or rock 500k worth of ice and gold on our necks. Here's to you Lil Jon, may you live long enough to pawn that beeyotch when your down on your luck.

Video of the Day: I Hate Duke University Edition

2007-03-21T16:04:00.000-07:00

I hate Duke University. I hate everything about it. I don't give a fuck-I'm going out like Tim Hardaway-I HATE DUKE and ANYTHING or ANYONE that has to do with DUKE

That being said, the following video had be laughing out loud for 10 minutes staight. Fuck all you beeyotches at Duke

How O.J. Mayo, Basketball Diva decided to go to USC: This wanker is a fucking joke

2007-03-21T09:11:00.000-07:00

So let me see if I understand this: O.J. Mayo is a 6'5" high school shooting guard who has bounced all over the nation playing basketball for 5 different schools. Typical for a shithead athlete-someone's always willing to give him a chance right? But this shitbird has already racked up a rapsheet worthy of a motherfucker in the pros:

-Assaulting fellow students during homecoming dance.
-Got busted with some dank.
-Bumped a ref, got suspended, got a fucking judge to throw out the suspension, and played in the nationally televised high school basketball game.

This kid is supposed to be the best high school basketball player in the country right now. But he can't jump to the NBA because they banned fools jumping straight to the pros from high school last year. So he's gotta go to college somewhere. So apparently he 'chose' USC.
Here are some excerpts from that article in the NY Times about how this came about:

A stranger walked into the University of Southern California basketball office one day last summer and asked to speak to the head coach. The stranger did not make an appointment. He did not call ahead. Tim Floyd, the U.S.C. head coach, cannot explain why he agreed to see him.

The mysterious man got right to the point. “How would you like to have the best player in the country?” he asked.Floyd tried not to roll his eyes.“Have you heard of O. J. Mayo?” the man asked.Of course Floyd had heard of him. Everyone in basketball had heard of him. Mayo was first mentioned in Sports Illustrated when he was in the seventh grade. He was considered a future lottery pick by the time he entered high school. He once talked trash to Michael Jordan during a pickup game at Jordan’s camp.

“O. J. wanted me to come here today,” the man told Floyd. “He wanted me to figure out who you are.”

“Why aren’t you at Arizona or Connecticut?” Floyd recalled asking.The man explained that Mayo wanted to market himself before going to the N.B.A., and that Los Angeles would give him the best possible platform.“Then why aren’t you at U.C.L.A.?” Floyd asked.The man shook his head. U.C.L.A. had already won 11 national championships. It had already produced many N.B.A. stars. Mayo wanted to be a pioneer for a new era.

WTF? Turns out that guy wasn't Mayo's dad(does he even know who he is?), uncle or any other relative. He was a fucking event promoter that 'befriended' Mayo. Remember this shithead is still in high school

“Let me call him,” Floyd said.The man shook his head again. “O. J. doesn’t give out his cell,” he said. “He’ll call you.”

Wow, "O.J. doesn't give out his cell". And Tim Floyd is supposed to coach this kid? Floyd should of told this rat-fuck to get the hell out of his office and take his horse with him. Of course Floyd creams his pants at the thought of getting his piece of prime beef at USC. Later Mayo calls him:

When Floyd answered the phone, he heard a teenager’s voice on the other end: “Coach, this is O. J. Mayo. I’d like to come to your school.”

Mayo asks how many scholarships does Floyd have and then tells Floyd that he'll bring some of his homies to play at USC too-WTF who's recruiting who now?

Before Floyd hung up, he asked one more time for Mayo’s cellphone number. “No,” Mayo said. “I’ll call you.”

Jeezus. I can see this ending really well for USC and Mayo. He's going to enjoy the college experience soooooo much. Tim Floyd will be his mentor, father-figure and coach him to help his game and Mayo will embrace it because he's all about improving himself as a player, but most importantly as a person.

Pftttt...yeah right. This is the fucking Titanic beeyotch. Pieces of Shit like Mayo have only one redeeming quality in their bodies-a talent for putting a leather ball through a metal hoop. No respect, no values, no personalities, no work ethic. Cue up "Send in the Clowns" USC is going to need it when this idiot gets on campus. The Bucket of Shit Award this month goes to O.J. Mayo, Tim Floyd, and USC.

Obama 1 - Clinton 0: Ohh Shit Clinton got blown up!

2007-03-20T08:50:00.000-07:00

Hilary Clinton is running for President in 2008. So is black man Barack Obama. I like neither of them, but I despise that praying-mantis-Madame Butterfly Hilary Clinton. So what happens last week? Someone posted a YouTube video mimicking Apple's '1984' Mac ad. But they slightly...'modfiy' it. Observe:

Ahhhh damn, I think there are some pretty pissed of assholes in Clinton's camp. This clip is getting all kinds of hype. The SF Chronicle is all over the beeyotch, here and here.

I did a search on Google News here with the words 'Obama, ad, Youtube'. Wow this shit is all over the place now.

I want a president that will kick ass and take names. Dude, chick, black, yellow, brown i don't give a fuck. But I DON'T want Hilary Clinton's ass in the White House. That beeyotch is crazy, power hungry and I don't know shit about politics and I can see that.

Vote or Die beeyotches.

Pic of the Day March 16th

2007-03-16T09:51:00.000-07:00

This is the first issue of a German PS3 magazine called CONSOUL.

Best.Magazine.Cover.Ever

You have got to be kidding me...

2007-03-15T16:53:00.000-07:00

Reading the SFgate this morning and saw this shit.

I got one question for all of you out there: Who would buy a fucking $275 Armani t-shirt?

One answer: Some dumbass Asian motherfucker that's who.

-probably from Hong Kong, Singapore, Japan
-Maybe some rich ethnic chinese freak from Indonesian, Malaysian or the Phillipines because we all know the native populations of these countries can't even afford rice on a stick.
-FOB-ass asians of all nationalities here in the United States. You know who I'm talking about-the dudes wear their hair in faux-hawks or combed forwards like effeminate videogame characters from Japan with 'highlights' that look better on their FOB girlfriends which brings us to...
-FOB chicks that all dye their hair the same shade of shit-brown or piss-yellow. They all look alike and weigh 90lbs each.
-Trendy Asian Bitch or TAB's These gold digging CfMs(Concubines for Money) just live for shit like this t-shirt.
-International Students who have their rich parents pay for anything they fucking want, including $275 t-shirts, common sense be-damned.
-American Born asians who don't know any better than to keep up with FOBs and TABs but are blowing up their credit cards in the process.

BTW the $275 t-shirt is the Armani in the middle. Fucking 'fashion' indeed.

late

Pic of the Day March 13th 2007 When Special Forces Goes Wrong Edition

2007-03-13T12:59:00.000-07:00

Ahhh the merry men of Special Forces. Truly the elite. Or As Will Smith put it in Men In Black "The Best of the best of the best!" These hale professionals have many responsibilities. One of them is to demonstrate their elite talents for dignitaries, politicos and civilians once in a while. To let the unwashed masses see what the 'Special' in Special Forces is all about. To bask in the glow of their otherworldly talents; to peek inside their world and glimpse the greatest warriors in the world doing what they do best.

Then you get shit like this. I hope to God this is a picture taken by ruthless, mocking teammates in a training scenario. If this was in front of a bunch of generals, this poor sunnofabitch was problably drummed out of whatever unit he was in. What WTF is up with the tighty-blackys underwear? How did this dude extricate himself from this shit? He's fucking rappeling down a building with his pants around his ankles!

Bad Tattoos: Sports Edition

2007-03-08T14:49:00.000-08:00

Is the such as thing as bad tattoos? Or a poor, defenseless tattoo that is inked on a shithead owner? I submit the following bad tattoo and the equally horrendous trash that owns it. Today's edition is sports. Prepare yourselves:

Wow. Let me start off with some quick-strikes:
-Backwards ball-cap, CHECK
-Goatee, CHECK
-Body hair,CHECK
-Wife Beater, CHECK
-Extra 50lbs of body fat, CHECK
-Hand signal showing that 'your' team is number one, CHECK

What does all these signify? A example of Wisconsinite whyte trash that almost blinds the eyes. This troglodyte symbol of Green Bat Packer fandom is the epitome of shithead. Is this idiot's life so deviod of meaning that he has to stencil himself with the logos of a professional athletic team? This moron is now has a t-shirt logo embedded in his skin? And I'm not even touching the evident homosexual man-crush this bovine fool has on whoever wears number '4'. Maybe thats the grade that he dropped out of school? Or it could be the '1' that he so strikingly is posing? Whatever it is, thank god he's thousands of miles away from me...but us Northern Californians have a different problem on our hands...namely people that walk around with shit like this on their bodies:
Unbelievable. Getting a picture of a haggard old man inked on your body. A man that would probably run you over in his limousine on the way to the stadium and not even stop. Raider Fan=slobbering idiot.

Pic of the Day, 3/7/07 Tim Hardaway Edition, inspired by the Onion

2007-03-07T08:56:00.000-08:00

What a wanker

Why I Hate Blacks

2007-02-28T20:26:00.000-08:00

Is Kenneth Eng wrong or just keeping it real? ..you decide.

Here is a list of reasons why we should discriminate against blacks, starting from the most obvious down to the least obvious:

• Blacks hate us. Every Asian who has ever come across them knows that they take almost every opportunity to hurl racist remarks at us. TRUE

In my experience, I would say about 90 percent of blacks I have met, regardless of age or environment, poke fun at the very sight of an Asian. Furthermore, their activity in the media proves their hatred: Rush Hour, Exit Wounds, Hot 97, etc. TRUE

• Contrary to media depictions, I would argue that blacks are weak-willed. They are the only race that has been enslaved for 300 years. It's unbelievable that it took them that long to fight back. TRUE

On the other hand, we slaughtered the Russians in the Japanese-Russo War. TRUE

• Blacks are easy to coerce. This is proven by the fact that so many of them, including Reverend Al Sharpton, tend to be Christians. TRUE

Yet, at the same time, they spend much of their time whining about how much they hate "the whites that oppressed them." TUE

Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't Christianity the religion that the whites forced upon them? TRUE

• Blacks don't get it. I know it's a blunt and crass comment, but it's true. When I was in high school, I recall a class debate in which one half of the class was chosen to defend black slavery and the other half was chosen to defend liberation. TRUE

Disturbingly, blacks on the prior side viciously defended slavery as well as Christianity. They say if you don't study history, you're condemned to repeat it. TRUE

In high school, I only remember one black student ever attending any of my honors and AP courses. And that student was caught cheating. TRUE

It is rather troubling that they are treated as heroes, but then again, whites will do anything to defend them. TRUE

Yellow journalism at its best - TRUE

I'm calling out Beeyotch-Ass players for their Beeyotch-Ass acts.

2007-02-27T16:28:00.000-08:00

Basketball is a man's game. You got motherfuckers scratching, clawing, shooting guns and shit...and that's to just buy a pair of Air Jordan 11s. Then when you actually play the game, you have to constantly be watching out so you don't get punk'd on the court by some shitheads who think that THEY are MJ, White Chocolate or fucking AI. Then you got to deal with the assholes who sweat like chinese coolies working on the railroad and 100% of the time they fucking stink like a $2 whore after a $100 night. And that's playing with foolios on the playground! So what kind of man do you have to be to play in the fucking NBA, the greatest league in the world, the greatest athletes in the world. Well, recently, some of the so called 'elite' players have shown...a somewhat less flattering image to the world. They have shown that being tall, rich, black, and athletically gifted doesn't automatically mean to have a pair of brass balls when it comes to being a man on the court. I submit the following with some succint commentary by me:

#1 Carmelo Anthony shows how they do it in Baltimore where he's from. I guess Baltimore is full of wanksters scared to fight.

-26 second mark-Anthony sucker punches a NY Knick and proceeds to run backwards down the court.
-36 second mark-Anthony has reached mid-court, still back-pedaling from the infuriated Knick player. WTF? He just set a new record for Bitch-Ass Back-Pedal From Baseline to HalfCourt time.
-46 second mark-Anthony isn't even in the picture anymore! Where is Carmelo? That motherfucker I think fucking ran into the stands! Wow, that's unbelievably...bitchlike.

Beeyotch Grade: A
-Melo totally moved from Wannabe Gangster to complete Wankster in the span of 20 seconds.
-He did a great job in showing the world that Baltimore is filled with bitch-ass marks that will sucker punch and run from a fight in record time. Kudos Melo, I glad that wearing baggy clothes has helped hide your menstrual period, but the truth is out you little beeyotch.

#2 Kevin Garnett starts a fight with Antonio McDyess. Then miraculously transforms into a white man fleeing from a angry black man. This shit is priceless. KG thought he was hard; the hardest thing in KGs house now is the erection on his dog.

Beeyotch Grade: B+
-KG tries to defend his teammate by first pushing and then tossing the ball at McDyess. First of all that was a bitch shove. If your going to push a man, FUCKING PUSH a man. No wussy-ass flailing at someone like your Suzie Rotten-Crotch on the playground. Then he tops it off by barely tossing the ball at McDyess' chest from 2 feet away. WTF KG? You think after those two wankster ass moves McDyess isn't going to have your ass now? He know's your a bitch and he's out for blood.
-Once McDyess advances on him in a menacing manner, KG transforms in the Bob from Accounting and starts backing the fuck up. But he's still trying to hold on to his masculinity by a thread, but it backfires horribly on him. KG throws a weak, girly right hook in the general direction of McDyess' collar bone. Maybe he has been listening to too much Wu Tang Clan shit and thought he has hitting a pressure point? Naaawwww, KG's a bitch. His manhood was scooped out and sold on eBay when he decided to stay in Minnesota and be Glen Taylor's bitch.
-KG grades lower than Melo because at least he stayed on the court, abeit behind teammates, coaches and officials. That's worth about a Warm Bucket of Spit.

#3-Dwayne Wade. This shit is solid-fucking-gold. You would think that being protected by the refs would have kept him safe. But what happens when little Dwayne hurts his little shoulder?

-Cry you little bitch CRY. WTF is this little bitch ass crying about? I've seen KIDS cry less when they're hurt.
-And WTF is up with the wheelchair. And they didn't just wheel his ass to the locker room either-he went straight into a fucking AMBULANCE in the wheelchair. Here's some photographic proof:
Beeyotch Grade: A++++
-Wade's a beeyotch and now there is no doubt. This mewling, slobbering Wussy is getting crucified all over the intertubes. Read this shit from the SuperiorPics forum:

BREAKING NEWS!!!!!

Doctors cannot examine Wade's injury because everytime they touch him, they get called for a foul... 13 doctors have already been fouled out and sent home for the night... STAY TUNED!!!!!!

Stay tuned for some more NBA Players That Are Beeytoches Awards.

Aid Worker Washes away the black

2007-02-23T05:17:00.000-08:00

Aid worker washes the black off African children as part of "White is Right" social assimilation policy.

Aid worker Lusa Vondorf, is seen vigorously scouring the bodies of a small group of South African tribal children in the otherwise clear and calm waters of the Jinaba river in the eastern region of Nigara. Under the newly enacted, White is Right policy, The South African, right wing coalition let by Dekbuk, mandated that all children below ten years of age in the eastern region undergo a daily government supervised scouring regiment to remove the dark melanin colouring from their skin. Social Minister, Chuk describes the policy as a way of excising the inherent cancer of social strife and classification. He portends the enactment will bring about an end to racial discord and serve as a model programme for other African nations. The new policy allows for the introduction of bleaches and pharmaceuticals to facilitate the colour neutralizing process and achieve the eventual goal of bringing about an albino like appearance. Environmental groups, from the UK and neighboring regional nations harshly and bitterly complain, voicing opposition to the governments new policy. The emphasis is placed on the possible risk to fish and citing the inevitable damage to the white sand beaches caused by the increased levels of dark melanin in the river. Tourism a key source of economy in the region also comes into play. Council members representing the local areas have noticed a sharp uptake of enquiries relating to the water quality and noticeable change in its appearance. Weary tourist also express apprehension stemming from the staining effect the darkened waters has on swim wear. In stark contrast, tourism in areas has increased markedly, with visitors returning to the regions beaches seeking out the golden hue the melanin laden river water imparts on their skin, considered by some as a passing fad due to the resulting tarmac colour and others a safer alternative to suntanning and UV exposure.

Vondorf, herself once of dark complexion but no longer, applauds the government enactment and supports the program. " She believes a society of single skin colour will discourage inequality, promote socialization and reduce the burden on industries to manufacture products for a variety of skin tones. Describing her routine with children, Vondorf, goes on to say, " As the children are in the river, I shout to them, utanja kontaja, utanja kontja mi bhja', it is like saying take the tar from off your skin my babies". Vondorf further explains "Sometimes I encourage the children to play games, like smack the black off each other or wash the gorilla". Asked about how children tolerate the pain and chemical agents she says, "I must tell the children as I am scouring them, to ignore the burning of the bleach, and to imagine how they will soon look like a relative of Michael Jackson, he I tell them his is atona moji, Gods great creation."

During the day, Vondorf can be found knee deep in dark pools of melanin effluent supervising as a program volunteer. Once mid-day arrives Vondorf transitions to cosmetology tradesman. Under the recently implemented Itinerant Trade Worker Program, Vondorf receives a monthly stipend for traveling by motorbike upwards of 200 kilometers per week providing her public funded service. Local villagers avail themselves of the service, departing from their huts and field work to queue in the sweltering sun along the 5 kilometer sun baked dirt transition road outside Jimbaba township for the off chance to undergo a thirty minute chemical process that renders the hair to an uncurled state and when available the application of a colouring agent. Vondorf, enjoys providing the free road side service and notices its increasing popularity with field workers, bush people and nomadic tribes who aspire to wear the emulated hair styling of western pop stars. When asked about request, she quickly admits, Brittany Spears, Oprah, Queen Latifah and the Supermodel Tyra Banks top the list. However, she doubts Spears recent change will be of interest to most.

Rick James, BBC Global News Service

Kirk's got something for that ass...

2007-02-22T10:52:00.000-08:00

It has been brought to my attention that SnapOffMode has been talking shit about Capt James T. Kirk of the Star Trek: The Original Series. It seems that he has a man-crush...err is a fan of one Capt Jean-Luc Picard, he too of the USS Enterprise only 80 years later in the shitpile Star Trek the Next Generation. I submit that Capt Kirk is the quinessential man of the 20th century, that he has done more for the TV show and indeed all red-blooded men everywhere than anyone else in the past 30 years. We all owe him a debt that can never be paid. This will take me several posts since Capt Kirk's greatness cannot be contained-it'll needs to be free and strong-like Kirk's loins. Let us begin.

First I'd like to point out that Capt Kirk fornicated with woman from across the galaxy. Many people object to this. The reasons are many: How is sticking your tongue down a alien's throat helping anything? Hasn't he contracted galactic syphllis yet? Isn't a Star Ship Captain supposed to set an example for his crew? All these questions are bullshit. Capt Kirk was a man's man. He took what he wanted when he wanted it. He was on a fucking FIVE year mission and the there are only so many hotties in a 400 person crew that a man like him could hit. And those chicks were off-limits (Except maybe Yeoman Rand, who got assaulted by the evil half of Kirk's personality in The Enemy Within, even then she admitted under questioning that she would have still let Capt Kirk hit it) So Kirk, like any visionary, had to look to the stars to get his groove on. But it was all in the line of duty. This was his way of spreading the values of peace, love and unity that embodied the Federation.
This is but a small sample of the aliens, androids, clones, psedopods, balls of alien shit, interdimensional whores, gaseous aliens taking human form and Capt Kirk has had to seduce, pimp, tap that ass, knock boots. He even went back in time to seduce Edith Keeler in 1928. Many times he has had to use his considerable amount of inter-stellar pimp skillz to save his life, the lives of his crew, and even the Enterprise itself. Who the fuck else was going to do it? Chekov? McCoy? Sulu? Scotty? Mr Spock? It had to be the Capt. This picture here doesn't even begin to show how many space slores he nailed. Capt Kirk did his duty. And if it involved him tea-bagging a green haired alien hottie, then so be it.

Until next time beeyotches...

Hate, Hate, hate everywhere...

2007-02-20T17:15:00.000-08:00

Here at WTF Foolio, we love to rant about shit that deserves ridicule, derision and plain old shit talking. So sometimes I read something that makes me laugh, chortle, and all that good shit.

Over at SFGate, the SF Chronicle website, they have a section called the Daily Dish. It's basically a gossip column about celebrity news and tidbits. Well, SFGate started allowing readers to leave comments on stories and the Daily Dish was no exception. Today there was a article about everyone's favorite skank, Paris Hilton. Here's the blurb:

Paris Hilton celebrated her 26th birthday in Las Vegas over the weekend with two dates.

The star celebrated at sushi restaurant Nobu with her sister Nicky, Nicky's boyfriend David Katzenberg and Nicole Richie and Joel Madden.

According to veteran Hollywood gossip columnist Janet Charlton, Hilton had two dates for the evening, former boyfriend Stavros Niarchos and Brandon Davis.

The socialite was seen hopping between Niarchos and Davis, alternately kissing one, and then the other, between bites of sushi.
The cozy threesome also reportedly shared a room at The Palms Hotel and Casino

Well I started reading some of the comments left by the citizens of my fair City and started laughing because some of the shit they left was funny as hell and since I do want to entertain my readers I'm going to reprint some of the better ones:

That's nice that people with herpes can find partners who have it too..er..don't mind!
Cum guzzling scuzz bucket. Semen belcher. Oh, lord, I just grossed my own damn self out.
I guess it takes two to fill er up these days, eh? sorry, poor taste. couldn't resist.
after her b-day celebrations, her next cosmetic surgery will be to put an elastic drawstring on her snatch to keep her organs from falling out.
I doubt these little twinks would know what to do with her body. She played it safe.
So, which one got the sloppy seconds?
Good question Drewby. I think the first guy in this case is getting sloppy 467ths.
"inbetween bites of sushi"? I imagine she was saying, "Get used to the smell boys"
She is so gross. I wish she would pull an Anna Nicole and just drop dead.

Ahhh San Francisco, you gotta love it. Where the streets run red with H8torade.

Tim Hardaway: Asshole of the Month Feb 07

2007-02-16T15:20:00.000-08:00

Jon Amaechi comes out of the closet so Tim Hardaway gets on the radio and loses his mind:

"You know, I hate gay people, so I let it be known, I don't like gay people and I don't like to be around gay people. I am homophobic. I don't like it. It shouldn't be in the world or in the United States..."
"And second of all, if he was on my team, I would, you know, really distance myself from him because, uh, I don't think that's right. And you know I don't think he should be in the locker room while we're in the locker room. I wouldn't even be a part of that,"

WTF? Wow that's some h8ter-aid shit right there. Does Hardaway want to be a contributor on WTF Foolio? Fuck no! This dude a Class-A Asshole. Let's try a little experiment. I'm going to replace the word gay and homophobic with some other 'words' and see what it looks like:

"You know, I hate black people, so I let it be known, I don't like black people and I don't like to be around black people. I am a racist. I don't like niggers. They shouldn't be in the world or in the United States..."
"And second of all, if he was on my team, I would, you know, really distance myself from him because, uh, I don't think that's right. And you know I don't think he should be in the locker room while we're in the locker room. I wouldn't even be a part of that,"

Damn, that sounds like some shit Cletus down in Mississippi would be saying, not a millionaire black athlete. No one has ever accused Hardaway of being the sharpest tool in the shed, but this quote is just plain Assholio Shit.

Hey Hardaway, when the shit starts flowing out of your mouth, you may want to close it. It's 2007, not 1950. You were the 'T' in RUN TMC, now your a punk-ass idiot lumped in with John Rocker, Rush Limbaugh and Jimmy the Greek.

The only difference between you and a bucket of shit is the bucket.

Retired S1Ws Recalled To Active Duty

2007-02-14T17:04:00.000-08:00

S1Ws on close protection duty for Public Enemy circa 1990

Reading The Onion and came upon this article about the S1Ws from Public Enemy getting called back into active duty. Man, this war in Iraq is tearing this country apart. Here's a snippet:

"I got a letter from the P.E. the other day," said James Bomb, 46, also a former S1W. "I opened it, and read it, and said they were suckers. They want me for their army or whatever? Picture me giving a damn—I said 'Never.'"

Article here

Pic of the Day 2/14/07 AnchorMan Edition

2007-02-13T22:39:00.000-08:00

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy is one of the funniest movies of all time. And one of the scenes was the 'gang' fight between competing news teams from Greater San Diego. Pictured here is the lead anchor for the Spanish language channel, Arturo Mendes, played by Ben Stiller and his crew of vatos.

Some observations:
-Check out some of the weapons that the news crews are carrying, they are all funny as hell but some stand out: Brian Fantana in Will Ferrell's crew pulls out a revolver, and spins the chambers to make sure it's loaded. The fact that it's the only gun anyone pulls out is funny enough, but this rumble's absurdity level just got kicked up a notch. Ferrell himself pulls out a fucking 2 foot long chair leg out of his jacket like he keeps it there in case he gets caught in a rumble. In Vince Vaughn's crew, the guy next to him pulls out a 4 foot long length of chain from inside his polyester suit like a fucking magician.
-The Channel 2 news team then shows up, led by Luke Wilson. One of his minions is carrying a fucking 3 foot long BROADSWORD like a fucking viking. Wilson himself is armed with a lead pipe with a rusty saw nailed to it. Another has a stick with a pair of scissors embedded in it for that extra umph!
-The Public News team shows up next led by Tim Robbins. "No commercials, No MERCY!" One dude is armed with a hatchet, another is fucking holding a lacross stick with nails attached to it.
-Finally, the Spanish channel news team shows with with Ben Stiller. Of course they got a latin flavor to their weapons. Stiller himself keeps it real by wielding a whip like Zorro. Another dude's carrying a fucking machete while holding a mexican rattle in the other hand. Of course they all are wearing their butterfly collars on the outside of their jackets.
-Basically, this clip is just one funny scene in a movie filled to the top with them. Enjoy beeyotches.

Pic of the Day 2/13/07 Friend fighting Friend to the Death Edition

2007-02-13T09:13:00.000-08:00

Spock fucks up the Captain in a Vulcan mating ritual gone horribly wrong.

Here's the original fight in all its glory, from the episode Amok Time:

And in one of the greatest movies ever made, The Cable Guy, Jim Carrey and Matthew Broderick, battle it out in this unforgettable tribute to the greatest friend on friend action of all time (From SnapOffMode):

Pic of the Day 2-12-07: Mondays at work suck edition

2007-02-12T02:38:00.000-08:00

I hate Mondays. And I especially hate Mondays where you have some chirpy co-workers asking you how your weekend was..."and OMG you won't believe what my terrible kid did this weekend and yadda...yadda". I wish I could wear this pic on a card around my neck. Get yourself a cup of STFU beeyotch.

Colorado: Hell on Earth or misunderstood Shang Ri-La?

2007-02-09T11:13:00.000-08:00

The Rocky Mountains, mile high altitude, skiing, Denver Broncos, Jolly Rancher candy; There are alot of great things to like about Colorado. That was before the fucking residents went ape-shit and all kinds of crazy and sick shit started happening. Lets recap shall we?

April 20, 1999 Littleton, CO-Columbine High School Massacre - Two punk-ass white boys decide they're getting off the Matrix and take as many people with them as they can. They fucking aquire an arsenal of weapons and homemade bombs under the noses of their oblivious parents and attack the school. Result? 13 dead, 24 wounded, and Littleton, CO becoming a fucking national symbol of clowning for the rest of this century. The only solace we have is that since the two fools committed suicide instead of getting a broomstick up the ass in prison, their getting a pitchfork up the ass in Hell.

Burn in hell cocksuckers

Summer 2003 Eagle County, CO- Kobe Bryant is accused of rape while there to get surgery on his knee. Dumb motherfucker then threw teammate Shaquille O'Neil under the bus when questioned by the cops, saying that "he should have done what Shaq does ... that Shaq would pay his women not to say anything" and already had paid up to $1 million "for situations like this."

Kobe and his victim err...date

Dec 26, 1999 Boulder, CO-6 yr old JonBenet Ramsey is found dead in her parents house the day after fucking Christmas. NO ONE knows what the fuck happened to her. Her parents are fingered by the Boulder Police. What ensues is a unholy feeding frenzy of TV interviews, press conferences, lawsuits and rolled eyeballs whenever the words Boulder and Colorado are heard in the same sentence . Also the fact that JonBenet's WASP mom put up her in creepy 'child' beauty pageants, was just another bizarre twist to this fucked up story. In the years since no one is arrested and the cops have no suspects. Then some freak American pervert err...teacher in Thailand claims he fucking killed the kid. But it then turns out even though dude is a deranged pedophile, he could not have possibly done the crime, since he hasn't mastered the art of being a pervert in two places at the same time. Busted for being a moron! To this date, no suspects, no arrests and its been 8 years and counting. Hooah! That's justice!

The parents and the poor child. Look at this shit, she never had a chance. Rustle them up in heaven JonBenet, rest in peace.

Sept 2003 Denver, CO - Pittsburgh Steeler linebacker Joey Porter is shot in the ass as he stands outside a downtown denver nightclub. He uses the experience to motivate his teammates. Watch near the end of this one-minute clip:

Jan 1, 2007 Denver, CO - After attending a New Years Eve party at a downtown Denver nightclub, Denver Bronco player Darrent Williams dies like a G, shot down while in his stretch Hummer in a hail of bullets in a drive-by assassination. Ironically celebrating his teams elimination from the playoffs, the amount of angst and bewilderment over Williams' gatting lasts a unusually long time since about 1000 young black men have already been gunned down in Oakland, CA in 2006 alone without nary a ESPN Sportscenter segment on them.

A fine, upstanding pillar of the community this guy was, no doubt.

April 8, 2006 Denver, CO - Denver Nuggets rookie guard, Julius Hodge, is shot three times while driving home from a downtown Denver nightclub. Since he neither died from his wounds or played in the Super Bowl, so no one gives a fuck. Sorry Julius.

***Photo not available** hahaha

Jan 12, 2007 Littleton, CO - A private investigator from Littleton, CO, Bryan Grady, pleads guilty to identity theft and conspiracy in connection with the HP spying scandal. Fuck, even with shit happening in another state, Littleton, Co can't catch a break.

***What's the point in even posting a picture of this loser?***

Dec 26, 2006 Fort Collins, CO - Teacher Carrie McCandless is accused of doing 'everything but sex' with a 17 year old student on a hiking trip when she was suposed to chaperone. The pair reportedly made out in cars, the woods, dry humped next to another sleeping student, drank grain alcohol and Jack Daniels, smoked dank, exchanged notes even after the trip-including 75 text messages in one day, and they never had sex.

Teacher of the Year.

That's quite a list of criminal acts and generally fucked up behavior. I could have gone on for more, but I'm lazy. Colorado has set the bar pretty high for other states to beat them in the Fucked Up News category. Does the high altitude alter human brain waves in Colorado? Sort of like Bizarro Aurora Burealis effect, but instead of cool lights in the sky, people just go plain fucking crazy? I have relatives in Denver myself and they are decent God-fearing people. I hope that none of this crazyness touches them.

My cousin K-Dog, who was raised and still lives in Denver, is tripping off the shabby treatment that Colorado receives. I feel for her, but damn, you can't ignore the motherfucking empirical knowledge I've just fucking dropped. Colorado has a worst rep than Mississippi. When was the last time you heard of the KKK killing someone last year? Colorado's screwed. If I was the governor, I'd cringe whenever I opened up the morning paper. It's enough to stick a sharp pencil in your eye.

PS: Watch the hell out if your a black athlete in downtown Denver. You will get fucking shot, that's a scientific fact. A strange phenomenon called "Catching a bullet in Denver-itis". THEY SHOT ME IN DENVER!

This is your brain on drugs..ERR video games

2007-02-08T14:49:00.000-08:00

From reader ChiuBacca a year back: Here is FPS Doug playing CounterStrike: Source. Sadly I rock it like FPS Doug once in a while playing CS:S and AA. Uhh there's nothing wrong with that. And this is just some crazy video on the InterTubes...yeah right. Anyway, don't laugh too hard.

Pic of the Day 2/8/07 Real Men of Genius Edition

2007-02-08T14:32:00.000-08:00

When I first saw this pic, I laughed for 5 minutes. Gets me everytime I see it. Seems like some folks were messing around in a office somewhere. Now this dude's a Internet legend. Here's to you Cheap-Handless-Cellphone-Headset Guy.

I have no clue why....(sentimental moment...be forewarned)

2007-02-08T09:51:00.000-08:00

...as I was in bed last night and couldn't sleep, an image from the past popped into my head. It happened when I was in first or second grade about the time when the actor became president. I remember my mom had just bought me this beautiful kite. She had regaled me with stories from her youth about making kites and flying them in the breeze. Believe it or not, there were even stories about these kite battles that took place where two kites would dog fight in the air until the life line was severed and the winner went home with two kites. My kite was beautiful. It wasn't like the good ole' Ben Franklin stick a key on it and I'm going to get cooked style. I was Asian and that meant it had to resemble a dragon. And boy did it! It had a tail that seemed to stretch 100 ships long and it flew higher than birds could fly.

Anyhow, one day I'm out flying my kite by myself. I was like 2 ft tall (maybe less) and flying a 100 ft kite. The wind was coming out of the hills like a hurricane and I didn't have school the next day. Life was good. All of the sudden, I tripped and lost handle on the spool of line. I panicked and jumped to my feet looking for it. The kite was pulling it away from me....and fast...So fast, in fact, that by the time I was able to reach the spool, it was stuck in a short tree on the highest branch. Now you're thinking...no biggie, just climb the mother fucker and get your kite back. You're Vietnamese! Tree climbing should be easy for you considering you've had all that practice stealing your neighbors fruits from their trees....Shit Foolio! That's what I was thinking to myself. But as I jumped and jumped for the lowest branch, I began to realize the folly of my Asian blood....I'M TOO DAMN SHORT to reach the lowest branch. So I did what any kid would do in that situation. I started cryin' my eyes out like a baby who just had their candy taken from them.

I didn't know how long I was there but eventually a Chinese man walking his dog walked past me. (you're wondering how I knew he was Chinese...are not all kids taught to fear the boogie man? but I digress) I thought he was going to help. I mean, who wouldn't help a little kid in a dire situation like that right? WRONG. Fucker kept walking. Right underneath the tree too. Now, this isn't like one of those giant redwood trees. It couldn't have been more than 15ft high...but still ....he kept walking. I swore at that very moment I'd never eat chow mein again...Bastard! So I started cryin' some more. Some time later, this white lady jogger comes up to me and says what's wrong? I pointed to my kite (which was still flyin' in the air). She then jumped on to the lowest branch and to the next and to the next until she was at the spool of line. This was the first time I had seen an adult climb a tree and let me tell you...it ain't a pretty sight..... She looked like she was going to fall and break something...or worst...lose my kite. Anyhow, she got hold of the line, came back down and handed me the spool. And as she handed me the spool, i noticed that her hands were bleeding all over the place. Nothing serious but just lots and lots of small cuts from climbing the tree. She smiled at me and was on her way.

Now this may sound stupid...but at that point...it was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me....someone I didn't even know....a stranger... And I think it left an impression on me.....that Chinese people are bad and that White people can be good. I just wanted to write this to put it down somewhere that there was a woman who helped a little boy and more than 20 years later....I still remember you.

Here's what this bitch-ass, trick-ass little disgrace SHOULD have said in his press conference today...

2007-02-08T00:25:00.000-08:00

Thank you everybody for coming today. I have a statement that I would like to read. As all of you know, I did not accompany my unit for deployment to fight in Iraq. First I told you guys that I believed the war was illegal and that's why I was confined to base, hanging around headquarters like a Two-Dollar basehead waiting for a trick. But today I would like to tell you the truth. And the truth is...I'm a just a little biatch. I'm literally and figuratively a YELLOW coward. You may find it ironic that a asian man is calling himself 'yellow' but it's a double-entrende, since my back is as yellow as Benedict Arnold's.

Yes, I refused to go to Iraq with my platoon of soldiers that counted on me for my leadership. And yes I admit I accepted a commission and I accepted a promotion to 1st LT, and I accepted a posting to a infantry, combat unit. But that doesn't mean shit to a back-slider like myself. I know now that I should have never joined a profession that uses words like Duty, Honor, Country. I mean, do they use words like that in like, you know, regular jobs? I don't think so. And I do not appreciate being called names like punk, pogue, trick, pillow-biter, traitor, mark, rat-bastard, shithouse lawyer, bitch-ass punk, trick-ass mark, fucking goddamn rat bastard or any other combination thereof. I mean grow the hell up people. I have to look out for all the rest of the Army, all 99.9% of them that have not realized the truth like I have. This whole Army, guns, death business in the Middle East is not what I signed up for. The daily reports of carnage and mayhem in Iraq is exactly the kind of stuff that I can change, back here in the rear, with the gear-so to speak. You can be I intend to disgrace err...speak-out on the illegal war out there. I am going to fight this court-martial as hard as my former platoon is probably fighting in Iraq. Thank you.

The highest view count on YouTube is this shit?

2007-02-07T11:41:00.000-08:00

14 million views and counting for this video. WTF

-Ta is this real or not?

Pic of the day Feb 6th

2007-02-06T15:12:00.000-08:00

Is this some crazy shit or what? This motherfucker deserves anything he wants

2007-02-06T11:39:00.000-08:00

I don't even have words to describe this story. Pretty funny too.

Subject: Letter from the Afghan Front
2/4/2007 12:21:05 AM

Hi everyone.

I'm still alive but freezing my tail off. We got 8 inches of snow last week and it reached 5 degrees below zero that night. That's not why I'm e-mailing though.
You may have heard about a suicide car bomb attack in Kabul last Thursday. It was at one of our FOB's (Forward Observation Bases) about 27 miles from here.
But the real story is why no one was killed.
We employ several thousand Afghans on our various bases. Not to mention the economy that is fed by the money these locals are making. Some are laborers and builders, but some are skilled workers. We even have one Afghan that just became OSHA qualified, the first ever. Some are skilled HVAC workers.
Anyway, there is this one Afghan that we call Rambo. We have actually given him a couple of sets of the new ACU uniforms (the new Army digital camouflage) with the name tag RAMBO on it. His entire family was killed by the Taliban and his home was where our base currently resides. So this guy really had nowhere else to go. He has reached such a level of trust with US Forces that his job is to stand at the front gate and basically be the first security screening. Since he can't have a weapon, he found a big red pipe. So he stands there at the front gate in his US Army ACU uniform with his red pipe. If a vehicle approaches the gate too fast or fails to stop he slams his pipe down on their hood. Then once the gate is lifted the vehicle moves on the 2nd gate where the US Army MP's are. So he's like the first line of defense. Last Thursday at 0930 hrs a Toyota Corolla packed with explosives and some Jack Ass that thinks he has 72 Virgins waiting for him approached the gate.
When he saw Rambo he must have recognized him and known the gig was up.
But he needed to get to that 2nd gate to detonate and take American
lives. So he slams his foot on the gas which almost causes the metal gate to go up but mostly catches on the now broken windshield. Rambo fearlessly ran to the vehicle, reached thru the window and jerked the suicide bomber out of the vehicle before he could detonate and commenced to putting some red pipe to his
heathen ass.
He detained the guy until the MP got there.
The vehicle only exploded when they tried to push it off base with a robot but know one was hurt.
I'm still waiting for someone to give this guy a medal or something. Nothing less than instant US citizenship or something. A hat was passed around and a lot of money was given to him in thanks by both soldiers and
civilians that are working over here. I guess I just wanted to share this because I want people to know that it's working over here. They have tasted freedom. This makes it worth it to me.

JOHN, CPT , US ARMY

Afghanstan is a place that many of us could only imagine in our dreams. Alot of good is being done over there. I hope that Rambo is taken care of.

I know this is out of left field but...Why the fuck is The Gap fucking slipping?

2007-02-05T23:43:00.000-08:00

Aight beeyotches, I ain't no fashion plate by any means. The last time I went shopping for clothes was for a funeral. I ain't no metro-sexual wussy and I ain't no asian wankster. But there is some shit that bothers the fuck outta me and thats the crazy shit going on with the Gap right now. It seems like the 50th fucking executive has bolted from that motherfucker in 3 months. Gap's been around since I was a kid, shit, my entire fucking family is clad in Gap, Old Navy and Banana. I'd be walking around buck ass nekkid if it wasn't for them. Shit was cheap, looked fine and the fucking stores were everywhere. And earlier in 2000 they were fucking legit, their ads made you feel good about wearing Gap shit like these:

Looking at that shit now, it is fucking obvious that Apple has stolen Gap's fucking mojo. First it was that 'Think Different' campaign, remember?

How different was Apple thinking when Gap was running shit like this already at the same time:

Apple's blowing the fuck up with their iPod ads:

But do you remember these Gap ads:

They are just Gap ads in black silhouette!

Same demographic, same target audiences, Apple took that fucking mojo quick style and are fucking raking in the $crill.
Gap better get off its ass. Cheap motherfuckers like me need their quasi-upper-middle-class cachet to not appear to be the cheapskate that I am. Where the hell am I going to get 3packs of seasonal boxers for less than $10? Fucking Wal-Mart? Get your shit together Gap: Azn motherfuckers are counting on you.

Super Bowl thoughts from the Nghiemesis

2007-02-04T22:30:00.000-08:00

Some of my thoughts from the Super Bowl:

-All I wanted to do was watch and see what Prince did. So I did not even turn on the TV all day until 2-3 minutes before halftime.

Fireworks start popping off at the stadium. My daughter looks up from her dolls and asks whats going on. I tell her that Prince is coming on. She then asks "..if he's the prince then where's his crown?" Damn kids...I don't answer her.
The show handlers unleash the 'crowd' to rush the stage. This sweating mass of humanity have about 100 ft to run across until they make it to the stage. One camera shows a delirious middle aged white chick rushing past. Uhhh...c'mon beeyotch, this shows gonna last 10 minutes then your ass is gonna be escorted straight to the Joe Robbie Stadium loading docks where they will 'release the hounds ' in five minutes unless your ticket-less ass gets the fuck on out. Is your life so devoid of joy that this glimpse of Prince's crotch is worth that?
There are two of Prince's hoes dancing around him starting with the opening song of 'Let's Go Crazy". They are dressed in black, puffy, boa-like jackets and black pirate, thigh boots. They are dancing WAAAAAAYYYYYYY too close to Prince. Even dancing in front of him. WTF? And they dancing not all sensous and sexual like Princes hoes usually do, they are dancing all Tina Turner crazy and shit, like they are at church, getting possessed by the Holy Spirit or some shit at the afternoon service of the Airport Boulevard First Church of the Savior. Then there's some other black bitch hanging off to the side, dressed in a white cat-suit with a fucked up round topped helmet, singing back-up, gyrating by herself. Whose fucking idea was those three beeyotches? When the fuck did Prince need a back-up singer?
Prince plays some shit I don't know in the middle of the set. A marching band comes out. This really piques my daughters interest especially when those fools start glowing in the dark. She's all up in it now. I hope Prince doesn't do some crazy shit and then I got to lie to my daughter to cover it up.
Then Prince changes guitars to the one pictured, I know that the last song is coming-which one is it? Purple Rain. He starts tearing it up on the guitar. The stupid dancers disappear. Prince is where he should be, by himself onstage-unless he's got some nekkid chicks thrusting their breastes and/or crotches up on him like the old days. Today is not that day. But this makes it all worth it. He tears that biatch up and shows everyone why he's the fucking Man.
When he's done with the song what does he do with the guitar? Ta if you don't know your a biotch.
Aight, the last part saved the entire set for Prince. And the games still sucked donkey scrotum, just like I thought. See ya next year beeyotches.

The NBA has got to get off of DuhWayne Wade's testicles

2007-02-04T21:31:00.000-08:00

Watching the Super Bowl in Miami today, it reminded me of a rant I wanted to get of my chest:

First watch these three videos courtesy of YouTube:

AND

AND

Here are my thoughts on this bullshit:

What.The.Fuck
I don't remember falling asleep for 4 years and waking up to find out that DWAYNE FUCKING WADE has given the status of 'Untouchable' in the NBA.
The examples here are nothing compared to the shit that went on in the NBA Finals last year. If I was Mark Cuban, I'd hire a fucking straight platoon of pipehitting, former Spec Ops dudes to fucking kidnap Wade and go to work with a 'blowtorch and a pair of pliers'
If it wasn't so blatant, it wouldn't be too bad. I mean, even the greatests players got away with shit now and then. But Wade's nut riding is ridiculous. How long has he been in the league? 3-4 years? WTF? He's getting calls that HoFers could only get.
Even motherfuckers over at ESPN are tripping the manlove that Wade's getting. This excerpt is from a chat log with columnist Chris Sheridan:

Oliver ( NY):
Isn't it great to be able to make 9 FG and get 41 PTS? I LOVE THIS GAME!!! I wish Kobe would get even half the calls Wade gets. MJ's greatness was aided by "superstar" calls or no calls, sorry, but Kobe gets half the treatment of a wade or Lebron, why?

Chris Sheridan:
You're preaching to the choir here, Oliver. every single night D-Wade gets three gift whistles (which even LeBron and Kobe don't get) at a minimum, and one or two late whistles, too. He's treated as preferrentially as Jordan was at the peak of his game, and it is infuriating to watch (unless you're a Heat fan). And I say all that being one of the biggest D-Wade guys around, a Marquette grad even. But it's just plain unfair to see one guy get such special treatment. It takes away from the game.

I can't watch Heat games anymore, because whenever there's a whistle, 10 to 1 it's Wade getting fouled.
Hey Wade, you have been added to the "I'm A Beeyotch!!" list.

Uhhh the Truth hurts...like a overstretched g-string on a fat bitch

2007-02-01T20:37:00.000-08:00

Man, I don't know where to start here...

The good thing is that is you stay exclusively in a urban area, say San Francisco or New York, you have a good chance of seeing freaks like the one on the left-white, black, asians, any race of the finest, female flesh in the world.
The sad thing is, you only have to drive a couple miles outside San Francisco into Marin and the East Bay to start seeing gastropods like the one on the right. Even worse, you know how the Earth is covered 70% by water? Well, in of 95% America, your chances of being struck blind by gelatinous, quivering, jiggling, flabby fat chicks are 5 to 1. For you non-gamblers those aren't good odds.
I know there are hot chicks in America. The problem is that many of them only have a small window of hot-ness in their lives. For some it might last only one, two years in high school or college, for others? Maybe it last long enough for them to land a husband but that's a double edged sword because thats also the same period of time when they'll get impregnated, thus ending the hot-ness period prematurely. For others it never comes, the hot-ness period short-circuited by fast food, canned meat, epic spam binges, midnight baloney/jelley sandwiches and so forth. For some they parley the hot-ness period in a career in movies. For the rest of the world's females? Their...uhhh normal human beings.
Do they even sell thong underwear in that size? Who the fuck would manufacture a thong in that size? What evil motherfucker would do such a thing? It's a goddamn crime against humanity, God and the fucking Queen. Were a bunch of designers sitting around in a room in Shitlick, Kansas allocating thong underwear to Wal-Mart, Target or Costco and said to themselves "We're not serving the fat demographic! Get the designers in here! We need a line of size XL thru XXXXL thong underwear stat!"

Pic of the Day Feb 1st

2007-02-01T15:23:00.000-08:00

I don't know who's girl this but I got two words:

PERFECT GIRLFRIEND

The Purple One...will live forever

2007-02-01T10:15:00.000-08:00

Since the Superbowl is upon us, its time to talk halftime entertainment obviously, because the game is going to suck the sweat off a donkey's scrotum. This year Prince will be performing. Everyone has their impressions of Prince:
Androgenous She-man

Jheri-curled-Lace Be-decked charlatan

Nevertheless, true motherfuckers know that Prince is one of the biggest pimps/guitarists/artists in the last 20 years of music. I don't think anyone will deny that the motherfucker has got nine-lives like freaking cat. You don't start recording back in the 70s and still be relevent almost 30 years later. And no one doubts Prince's hedonistic lifestyle, his straight craziness-just look at the motherfucker, he's liable to lick you up the side of face or give you the stinkeye with his freakish eyes and perfectly trimmed facial hair. David Chappelle and Charlie Murphy did a sketch about crazy Prince from the 80s. Don't pull a muscle laughing.

Snatchin' Pebbles Biatches!

2007-01-31T17:12:00.000-08:00

Ahhh yes, a seminal moment in kung fu history, Master Kan telling the young orphan Caine to 'snatch the pebble' Some facts about this scene from TVAcres:

According to The Kung Fu Book of Caine by Herbie J. Pilato (Charles Tuttle, 1993), Radames Pera shared his memories of the pebble scene. "Everytime Philip Ahn offered me the pebble, I was able to take it out of his hand. I didn't mean to do that...But everytime he opened his palm...you'd hear (the director yell) 'Cut', because it wasn't there." To solve the problem, director Jerry Thorpe instructed Pera to telegraph his hand movements so Philip Ahn could shut his hand in time. After some fifteen takes, the scene was completed. The popularity of the series gave Philip Ahn multiple opportunities to recreate this pebble scene with his admirers, especially those who visited the Moongate, his Chinese restaurant. There, children would present themselves to Mr. Ahn and ask to "snatch the pebble" from his hand. The generous actor/entrepreneur obliged and gave many a youngster a happy remembrance of snatching the pebble from the sage Kung Fu master.

Man, how cool is that shit if you were a kid at the restaurant and you saw Master Kan sitting there, chilling in his restaurant. Then rolling up on him and getting to snatch the pebble out of his hand like Carradine in the TV show? Fuck, the possibilities would be endless: You could walk into Will Ferrell's jazz bar and make him eat a dish of dog shit, just like in Anchorman! You could roll up on 24's Kiefer Sutherland as he sits in the Fox offices, accuse him of being a mole and scream into his face "WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR?!!"

Pic of the Day-Jan 31

2007-01-31T00:09:00.000-08:00

When you got into a bird, the pilots didn't say shit to you, you were lucky if you even saw them. It was the enlisted crew that told you what to do. This pretty much sums it up nicely. Couldn't have said it better myself.

Remembering the song that started it all...and one little city called Compton, the Shining Beacon on a Hill

2007-01-30T20:48:00.001-08:00

When I heard NWA's album "Staight Outta Compton" back in 1988, that shit blew my mind. Where the fuck did this shit come from? Who the hell were these guys. Why are they so fucking angry? Where can I get this shit?

Of course there were thug-ass dudes that you heard about, but no one ever talked about them except if one of your mark-ass friends bragged about a gangster they knew or had one as a relative. I remember Cheo Brown, in elementary school, talking about Crips and Bloods in hushed tones in the cafeteria, like he was scared a thug was going to rise up out of a steaming pot of creamed gruel and fuck him up on the spot.

Naw, this NWA shit was straight eerie because it real. These dudes weren't dressed-up, jheri-curled(except of Ice Cube and Eazy-E, but hey-they hid their shit under a hat), high-top faded, S-curled pretty boys, dancing and shit. They were angry motherfuckers, and they spent the entire video running from the police and making menacing trigger-pulling gestures at the camera. They resonated with me because they looked just like the black dudes you saw when you rolled thru shitty parts of town; thru the ghettos that everyone avoided (like Martin Luther King Blvd in any city in the US). I got the feeling that they were talking about crazy, real shit that happened all the time in that mythical city of Compton, where only gangsters lived and everyone wore LA Kings and LA Raiders gear day or night, 365 days a year. Had everyone ever heard of Compton before NWA? I hadn't, and I was hooked. So if you never heard of Compton before and watched the video for Staight Outta Compton, you would think that Compton was in Beirut or some shit. Normal shit didn't happen in Compton-you could stand there all day and watch groups of gangsters running away from groups of cops. I hit up YouTube to jog my memory and found this shit

NWA was a fucking paradigm shift in rap. Oh yeah there were MCs before that spit about the 'hood and shit. But did they crack $bank$ like NWA did? Did they freak out American society like NWA did? NWA grabbed America by the both sides of it's head, slapped it around and made America look. Look at the ghettos, the destitution, the crime. And these dudes didn't give a fuck. They were laughing all the way to the bank when all those white suburban kids were buying their album by the millions. And me too. And literal army of imitators have followed them, all claiming some other ghetto as worse or even more fucked up than Compton. Neighborhoods in New Orleans, East St. Louis, Detroit, New York, any urban area in the US practically-all bullshit. You motherfuckers are all beeyotches trying to ride the nutsack of NWA and Compton.

Check this shit out by folk singer Nina Gordon. She fucking sings Ice-Cube's part like it was fucking Simon & Garfunkle or some shit. And to her credit she fucking kills it. No bullshit, props to her for keeping it real. Natalie Merchant ain't got shit on her.
Watching this video again, I know all you people remember your feelings when you heard/saw it for the first time. What did you feel? Revulsion? Shock? Agreement? Or did you bob your head at the beats, the scratching and the reckless rhymes by Ice Cube and Eazy-E (fuck MC Ren, that B-Team shithead)
The cops in the video are fucking comical. White, mustachioed, mulleted, ready to fuck a nigga up in a heartbeat. Lounging around in vacant lots around Compton, polishing their batons, and ready to roll in a moments notice to round up "the element".
When Eazy-E is rapping, watch when he's in the storm drain. If you look up and behind him, there are hundreds of motherfuckers lining the upper rails looking down on him. Brilliant. That's straight subversive imagery if I ever saw it. Like they have some sort of following and Eazy-E is one of the high priest or some shit.

Fuck Tom Brady: This time its Personal

2007-01-29T21:19:00.000-08:00

This pic says all one thousand words that I want to say about this no good-overrated, trick-ass, mark-ass, punk-ass, wussy (half wimp/half pussy), little beeyotch. I got a special place for the likes of his sorry, Tuck-Rule, wannabe Montana ass. This motherfucker is from Pinole, when is the last time you saw a cowboy there?

Pic of the Day

2007-01-29T11:26:00.000-08:00

This is for all the shitheads trying to 'help the children' by legislating against 'violent' videogames. Let's try an another idea: LET PARENTS RAISE THEIR OWN GODDAMN KIDS, YOU ASSHOLES. Yeah I'm talking to you Jack Thompson-Ichiban asshole.

"What did the five fingers say to the face?"

2007-01-29T09:19:00.000-08:00

A couple of observations about this skit:

David Chappelle was one funny motherfucker when he and the writers for the show were on their game.
Charlie Murphy is one of the most fearsome looking black men in Hollywood today. He's like the black version of Danny Trejo. But he's as funny as Chappelle in this episode. He makes it work with his wild-story-telling style. But dude looks like the Bizarro Eddie Murphy. I think people look at him and think: Man I recognize that guy...fuck he looks kinda scary...damn he's funny though...is that Eddie's brother?...that is one crazy looking black motherfucker...
On the Season 2 DVD for the David Chappelle Show, they included more uncut interview time with Charlie and that shit is funny as hell. Dude has got stories that would make a dead man laugh. When you hear about his experience at a Earth, Wind and Fire concert in the 80s, you have to think to yourself "Why didn't anyone die?" That has got to be one helluva story.
I can watch this shit all day and never get tired of the Wong Fei Hong kick that Charlie gives James into the dresser in his hotel room.
When Rick James is grinding his feet in Eddie's couch? A moment in WTF Foolio History. What.The.Fuck? I couldn't even imagine that happening in my house, to my new couch. To paraphrase Charlie Murphy "Rick looked us right in the eye as he dug his feet into Eddie's couch-Fuck your couch nigga, fuck your couch! Best.Line.Ever That's going to be the new c'est la vie, but WTF Foolio style. I hear it now "Man, why don't you help me with my taxes?" "Hell no foolio...uhh...fuck your couch nigga"

Oh and the subject of Chappelle going crazy after they gave him that phat contract? That's for another day.

Where no black man has been humiliated before...

2007-01-25T23:50:00.000-08:00

Why does the black dude on Star Trek: The Next Generation have to wear some fucked up, Federation issued, birth control devices/beer goggles? If I was LaVar Burton I would have sued Paramount and Gene RoddenBerry for making me look like a moron for 7 years on TV and 4 feature films. Spock had his ears, but everyone knew he was the real power on the bridge and the smartest officer in the Federation. Giordi La Forge was nothing but a cyclopian minstrels in space.
Burton went from Kunta Kinte to Token Negro In Space all in one career. Motherfucker should have stayed at Reading Rainbow. At least he could have kept his dignity.

WTF Foolio? Look at this dude...am I going to have to fuck somebody up?

2007-01-25T15:38:00.000-08:00

Just. Look. At. This. Picture.

Some questions pop up in your mind:

Is this some kind of fucking joke?
What army could this ball of fat be in?
Seriously, is this a joke?
Do they really make Load Bearing, Tactical Vests in that size?
Is that a kid's helmet or is that dude's head that fat?

Answers: No, no, no, no and fucking no

After digging around the intertubes, I found out some more about this...specimen. The mastadon here is playing soldier with his airsoft gun. What's a airsoft gun you ask? It's a fucking bb-gun thats what. People roleplay like they are in a army, with these airsoft guns as their weapons. You can read more about it here. That's right, a glorified bb gun, just like the Red Rider BB-gun that Ralphie was after in A Christmas Story. Apparently its really popular in Japan, where I hope to God this guys lives because if he's in America, I will hunt him down like the baby elephant that he is. He's fucking playing soldier with a fucking bb-gun. He's wearing all that military gear that he probably bought online because he's too embarrassed to walk into a Ranger Joes, has a $500 replica M-4 Carbine that just shoots bbs?

You want to talk about weekend warriors? These airsoft freaks are so pitiful they make the pogues in the National Guard and Reserve look like fucking Special Forces Green Berets! Airsoft is the closest that this gelatinous lump of shit can get to a army, unless he drives by a military installation. The only positive he's doing is testing out the stretching capacity of the side panels of that overmatched TacVest that he's wearing. Somehow I don't think his massive girth was the ideal template that the manufactuers had in mind when they designed it. This fat body must find pants confining. This dude should be running around in a poncho, muumuu, jumpsuit, unisheet, muslin body roll, or academic or judicial robe, not woodland camouflage BDUs. Fucking fatburger.

I had the misfortune of finding more than I ever wanted to know about airsoft than is healthy. They have to be the most pathetic bunch of shitheads in my recent memory. You have a fucking war going on in Iraq and you have these idiots posting on message boards shit like this and this! Here's a sample post by one of those assholes:

Post some pics of your US Marine loadouts. Even though I know all of them will be desert ones. I would still love too see them. And the first who has a Marine Force Recon loadout gets a cookie.

This post got fucking over 100 pages of replies. This was posted by this asshat here. Looks like the next Audie Murphy right? More like broomstick up the ass bait.What the fuck kind of fantasy world are these fleshlumps living in? Fucking real men are putting their ass on the line everyday all over the world so shitbird here can sit in front of his computer and spew that shit? Someone gimme a knife so I can shank a motherfucker.

***Also found this story of a bunch airsofters almost getting killed by the local cops for 'playing soldier' in the streets. They had every available cop from the entire area converge on them, thinking something very bad was happening. Too bad they didn't get shot down like the dogs they are. This world would have been a better place if they did. Fucking Darwin failed us that day.***

Did Reuters fuck with this picture too?

2007-01-25T12:15:00.000-08:00

/start sarcasm

Some Joes in Iraq, terrorizing the the population again. Those fucking stormtroopers have no shame. Those Iraqi people are probably just trying to cross this bridge when Dubya's running-dog-Gestapo-US Army thugs ran up on them and probably start demanding money or food or probably sexual favors from the woman. They are obviously terrified. There are probably 20 other soldiers pointing their weapons at them, forcing them to smile at gunpoint, it's sickening. Thank God we have photographic proof of this criminal shit going on over there. It was probably a Reuters photographer who bravely took this Pulitzer Prize worthy pic. Those guys are known for their journalistic integrity and courage. Bring our soldiers home so me and my cronies..err fellow-activists can mock...err speak to them!

/end sarcasm

Seriously, all you Joes serving this country of ours, keep up the good work. As Drill Sergeant Blossom said "Stay Alert, Stay Alive"

Pic of the Day-Jan 25

2007-01-25T11:37:00.000-08:00

WTF? Between the eight of these guys and all the medals they have been rewarded, you would think they conquered the galaxy or some shit. Fucking Commies.

The Eagle has landed

2007-01-24T21:57:00.000-08:00

First I got to get a shout out to my boy Terrell Owens. Here's a pic of "The Catch II". Once he caught that pass from Steve Young, he got DOTTED by two Packers and still held on to the winning catch. No one could take a hit like T.O. All haters can suck a fat dick.

Aight, back to tonight's regularly scheduled programming:

What is WTF Foolio? Well let me explain in two parts:
What
The
Fuck

If you have never heard that term before spelled with that acronym, then get the f*ck off that computer and let someone who knows how to use one get on. Your probably a f*cking troglodyte anyway and your stealing oxygen from the rest of us.

Now that we've got that out of the way, what is Foolio? It's just a play on the word fool. I like calling people foolios. As in "What's up foolio?" Back in 1993 when I was in college I used to work at Nordstrom in the SF Centre. There was a restaurant on the 2nd floor called the Pub. There we had a sous chef named Johnny. A short, stocky, Mexican, ex-con sous chef. He had prison tats up and down his arms and torso, he liked wearing wife beater shirts, sported a f*cking Mexican mullet and rocked vato flannel shirts, I mean all that La Familia shit. But when Johnny was at work he was all business- he wore the cook's blouse, those checkered cook pants and was polite to everyone, even the shithead Anglo waiters who used to fuck with us lowly busboys and cooks. Anyway Johnny was the dude that called people foolio, but he had his pattern. If he was calling you foolio, that meant he wasn't mad at you, which meant that you could go into his kitchen and eat anything you could get your hands on. If he didn't call you foolio, then well...you had better not make eye-contact with him because he would have probably shanked you with a sharpened spoon.

Ahh the memories.

So these days I use foolio as a term of endearment-for my homies and co-workers that I like. So I'm upholding the tradition that started with good 'ol Johnny, ex-con sous chef at Nordstrom.

Put both terms together and you got WTF Foolio, my blog. I'm a observant person. I go about my day not bothering anyone. But when I see something weird, jacked-up or fucked up-the first question that comes to my mind is "What The Fuck Foolio?" So I'm putting these observations in the ether. If you don't like it too bad, go here and get your rocks off.

As Dr. Dre said "The motherfucking saga continues..."